Review: The “Sleepless” Wit of A.D. Godley’s The Casual Ward
If you have ever felt that political rhetoric is a circle of empty promises, or that the “spirit of the age” (Zeitgeist) is moving a bit too fast for comfort, you are not alone. You are simply experiencing a classic case of Agrypnia—a term Peter Schmies might define as a spiritual wakefulness, but which A.D. Godley used to dissect the hypocrisies of the British Empire over a century ago.
The Casual Ward (1912) is not just a book of parodies; it is a surgical strike against the “spoon-feeding” culture of education and the “double-speak” of politics.
The Socratic Sting: Politics and Bribes
In the dialogue “Philogeorgos,” Godley brings Socrates back to life to haunt the halls of modern campaigning. He exposes the thin line between a “bribe” and a “promise.” When a wine-seller offers free drinks for votes, it’s a scandal. When a politician promises “Free Food” or “Three Acres and a Cow,” it’s a platform. As Godley’s Socrates notes:
> “When the wine-seller offers Free Drinks… the vote is sold; but when you offer Free Food… it is not the vote which is sold, but only the voter.”
>
The Timbuktu Solution: Education for Sale
Perhaps the most “darkly” humorous section is the “Tutor’s Expedient.” Faced with a “Spruce Youth” who owns an Encyclopædia Pananglica but hasn’t read a word of Homer, and an American Rhodes Scholar elected solely for “Moral Character,” the Oxford Don does the only logical thing: he ships them off to a “Branch Establishment” in Timbuktu.
Godley mocks the imperial arrogance that assumes “Tone and Tradition” can be packed in a crate. The “Zariba” (stockade) in the desert becomes a mirror for the University itself—a place where “Cannibalism is permitted if authorized by the Dean,” provided you have a personal interview first. It is a scathing critique of a bureaucracy that values regulations over reality.
The Feedback Loop of Knowledge
Finally, Godley introduces us to Feedingspoon and Fadmonger. Through these characters, we see the death of original thought. Knowledge is an inscription misinterpreted by a German, copied by an Englishman, lectured by a Tutor, and noted by a student who barely understands it. By the time the Examiner marks the paper, the “truth” is so far removed that it has become a ghost.
Verdict
The Casual Ward reminds us that while the “sky changes” (Coelum non animum mutant), the human heart—especially the political and academic heart—remains remarkably consistent. Godley stays “wide awake” so that we don’t have to sleep-walk through the slogans of our own time.
🖋️ About the Author: A.D. Godley (1856–1925)
Alfred Denis Godley was a man of two worlds. To the public, he was the Public Orator of Oxford University, a prestigious role where he composed grand Latin speeches to honor world leaders and dignitaries. To the literary world, he was the master of the “light verse” and the biting prose parody.
* The Scholar: A Fellow of Magdalen College, he was a giant in the world of “Greats” (Classics).
* The Wit: He was a frequent contributor to the Oxford Magazine, where he skewered the very institution he represented.
* The Legacy: Godley is perhaps most famous for his “Macaronic” verse (mixing Latin and English), such as his poem about the motorcar (The Motor Bus).
* The “Agrypnos“: Godley’s work is defined by a refusal to be bored or fooled. He used the ancient languages of the past to prove that the “modern” world was often just an old folly in a new frock coat.
Grammar and Maths
I parked the bike inside the garage. It was twilight. There were goats returning in a herd. Students were leaving when my father asked me to take help from them to push it up the ramp to park it inside. He had returned with vegetables and groceries. Mother was also not in the house. She first went to a grocery store and then to the house of some acquaintance.
My class concluded with an exercise in their Grammar workbook. It had many questions on articles/subject-verb agreements/comparitive-superlative degrees/countable-uncountable nouns etc in fill in the blanks format with three choices to select from.
Together they answered about half of them correctly though it was just by using chance. They didn’t grasp any of the questions though I kept explaining those. The younger brother kept shifting his answers at random just to sound correct. As soon as he learned that his choice was incorrect he shifted to the other choice.
He made ink star even today in his left hand’s palm with my pen. Prior to that he was using that to pinch his elder brother. Both of them were fighting eachother physically before class commenced as I was busy organising utensils in the kitchen.
Since there’s Republic Day tomorrow, they’re going to attend school only for cultural programs and enjoy sweets. They had completed their homework though the younger student used red ink to complete it. When I tried to explain him that teachers are supposed to use that and he should use a blue ink- he told me that nobody asked him to not use that even in his school.
Today they didn’t use their smartphone which was a great change. I gave them five addition and five subtraction problems as assignement. The younger one was reluctant to not it down.
He was dancing every now and then and then they kept quarreling. Looking into the mirror of the window he told me how he appears bigger in some mirrors and smaller in others. Asked my permission to use body lotion. Then they asked about its price.
I told them about the museum near this city where mirrors give various images in which you appear obese or lean, taller or smaller. I told them they can visit that place though it charges a ticket for a visit. Then I told them that maybe only grown ups are supposed to visit as this archeological site has many valuable items.
We did a couple of problems in Maths. I wasn’t prepared. I used the solution. It uses Congruence. A bit of construction and then proves that two equal length chords intersect at a point which when joined with the centre of the circle subtends equal angles with both of them.
In the next problem there were three girls sitting on the periphery of a circular park. They have a ball which they throw at each other. The distance between first two of them is six meters. The distance between the second two of them is also six meters. The distance between first and the third is to be obtained if the radius of the circle is given. This one uses a triangle by connecting the centre of the circle with the position of the girls. Area of a triangle is one by two multiplied with base of the triangle multiplied with the height of the triangle. The two orientations of triangles are such that one of them gives the half length of the chord and doubling it gives the requisite length.
Calicle, Calyx, Chalice, Calculus
The Governor’s Oath and the Smelly Socks
I prepared tea once more and served it to parents and grandmother who were sitting in the hall. Placed the chair back to where it belongs. Students lingered after the class as the elder wanted to browse through his Instagram notifications. He wanted me to delete one of the accounts in the accounts centre. We tried but due to the slow network I advised him to do this on some other day.
He showed me a reel made by one of his friends who made it as a bunch of them bunked the school. They’re seen walking towards wilderness. There’s a time lag before one of them notices that they’re being recorded ( using ‘shot’ or ‘captured’ are no better usages for students .) He sets his hair looking at the camera.
The elder is playful. Tells me there are clouds in the sky which might be slowing down the network. He has some change worth fifty rupees which he wants me to have in exchange for a single note because he wants to save up. Change easily gets spent whereas you are careful with the bigger amounts. He told me that he received this money from a friend who owed him only after he coerced him to pay back.
He begins to put his signatures on a ten rupees note. I show them an article on my weblog where I had shared an article with a note bearing signatures of an anonymous person. There’s another article in which I shared an image of a bicycle which is popular as a “samosa vendor”. I show him that a ten rupees bill is a legal document. There’s an oath by the governor. There are multiple Indian languages. His signatures are similar to graffiti. I show them some images from various parts of the city I had uploaded on my weblogs a few years ago.
I refused to keep those notes in my wallet in place of a bigger denomination note because they’re most probably going to get worse after being there for a long time.
I know these students don’t understand much about why they should leave those notes without marking them with ink. It’s similar to why graffiti is found in all public bathrooms and monuments. I witnessed a lot of raw creativity like this.
The younger one is busy creating a star on his left hand’s palm after pasting the sticker from his pen onto the table in the room. It’s thrown into the dustbin after they leave. He didn’t throw it away despite my asking it to him. I look under the table after they leave. There’s dust. I need to sweep the room tomorrow. It has been a few days. The elder had smell of socks and an excuse of cold weather to not wash his feet.
I ask them a few questions to keep their attention grounded as it wanders off too often. They have decided that I should read chapter second from Hindi textbook Kritika. It’s written by Mridula Garg. It’s about women in her life.
I open the image of Mridula Garg in the Wikipedia article. She’s alive! Now it’s their turn to use adjectives like “Budhiya”( old lady ) for her. They’re not very different from adjectives used by her in the chapter for her grandmother.
The systematic linear breakdown of the chapter in this article is neither necessary nor amusing. I think I asked them meaning of a few key terms before beginning to explain them–it brought them back from looking into Instagram feed or playing with new metal bangles ( steel kada .) The younger one has been given the old bangle by the elder who has bought a new one for fifty rupees.
They both went to school yet none of them have done their homework. I ask them to complete that without giving them any more. Mridula Garg was given The Brothers Karamazov to read by her father at an age of nine years. Which seemed like an unusual complexity for such a young mind. Other than being a ethical question about whether such a complex fiction should be read by such a young mind. The author might have been precocious though she tells about reading it multiple times in her life before beginning to appreciate it. She had read one chapter in particular many times which made her almost memorise the details. It was about the agony faced by young children.
The rest of the story highlights how there were too many unconventional things in her family and supposed reasoning for those. Like for example- ladies who wrote a lot or dared to break norms. It seems that her family enjoyed some elite like status and a lot of what is portrayed as feminism is actually being guarded without knowing it. Maybe she published the work at an age when such veils are not uncovered. For an audience which readily believes all that happened to be true. Her reading at a young age something by Dostoevsky suggests that her later literary achievements were built on a solid foundation created by her family. It’s a chapter about her family. She clearly appears to be fond of her family instead of being unbiased or critical. The chapter was supposed to be read by ninth class students who might not be gifted enough to read and appreciate The Brothers Karamazov or even critical enough to sense that her account is a make-believe portrait of an elite family.
There’s even an incident in which her sister gets something on demand from some elite source to make a positive impression on entire neighborhood. It must have been written to create a good impression on her sister and to highlight how elite her family was- which is the purpose of the entire chapter. The chapter is supposed to be about feminism. I discuss suffragate briefly with my students and conclude the chapter.
H. P. Lovecraft and Walter John Held: Irony From Pages of UAPA
THE SPECTATOR for June-July, 1914, though somewhat trite in title, is the first number of a magazine notable for its quality. Walter John Held is without doubt one of the most enterprising youths who have ever joined the ranks of the association, though his views on paid subscriptions and advertisements show his still imperfect acquisition of the true amateur spirit. Mr. Held mistakes commercial progress for artistic development, believing that the aim of every amateur in his ascent toward professional authorship is to write remunerative matter. He therefore considers a publisher’s advancement to be best shown in ability to extract an odd penny now and then from a few subscribers who really subscribe only out of courtesy. We wish that Mr. Held might come to consider amateur journalism in its higher aspects; as a medium for improvement in literature and taste; an aid to the cultivation of the art for its own sake in the manner of gentlemen, not of cheap tradesmen. The selection of commercial prosperity as a goal will ruin any true literary progress, and dull the artistic aspiration of the student as soon as his mercenary instincts shall have been satisfied. Besides, there is really no sound business principle in the so-called “sale” of little papers. No youth could ever found or sustain a real magazine of substantial price and more than nominal circulation. The various ten-cents-a-year journals which some[19] “amateurs” try to edit are no logical steps toward actually professional publishing. The latter comes only after literary skill has been attained, and literary skill must at first be developed without regard for immediate monetary profit.
[ This passage reflects his views on amateur journalism as compared to professional]
This passage is a foundational text for understanding the philosophy of the Amateur Journalism movement, and it is quintessential H.P. Lovecraft. At its core, it outlines a sharp, elitist divide between “Art for Art’s Sake” and “Commercialism.”
The “Gentleman” vs. The “Tradesman”
The reviewer (Lovecraft) views the UAPA not as a business school, but as a literary gymnasium. His critique of Walter John Held is based on a few key aristocratic ideals:
* The Amateur Spirit: To Lovecraft, “Amateur” does not mean “unskilled”; it means “motivated by love” (from the Latin amator). He believes that once you introduce money—even an “odd penny”—you corrupt the purity of the work.
* The Aristocracy of Letters: He uses the phrase “in the manner of gentlemen, not of cheap tradesmen.” This reflects an 18th-century mindset where writing for money was seen as slightly “vulgar.” A gentleman writes to improve his “literary taste” and “intellectual vigor,” not to fill a ledger.
* The Fallacy of the “Ten-Cent” Paper: He argues that these tiny subscription fees are a farce. Since no amateur can actually run a profitable magazine, trying to charge for it is just a “logical error.” He believes one should develop skill first, and only when that skill is perfected should one look toward the professional, remunerative world.
Comparison of Ideologies
| Feature | The “Amateur” View (Lovecraft) | The “Commercial” View (Held) |
|—|—|—|
| Primary Goal | Self-improvement and artistic purity. | Growth, circulation, and revenue. |
| Success Metric | Refinement of prose and “rhetorical taste.” | Ability to attract paid subscribers. |
| Writing Style | Classical, formal, and elevated. | Pragmatic and “remunerative.” |
| Final Objective | Perfection of the craft before entering the world. | Using the amateur press as a business launchpad. |
Historical Irony
There is a profound irony in this passage. Lovecraft spent much of his later life struggling in extreme poverty, often refusing to “sully” his work for commercial appeal, yet he spent years as a “ghostwriter” and revisionist for hire—effectively becoming the “tradesman” he warned Held against, just to survive.
Walter John Held, on the other hand, was following the “American Dream” model of the early 20th century: using a hobby to learn the mechanics of the marketplace.
In a twist of fate that aligns perfectly with the reviewer’s debate over “commercialism,” Walter John Held did not become a famous literary figure, but he arguably “made it big” in the very world the critic (H.P. Lovecraft) warned him against: business and industry.
While his literary “spectating” largely faded after the amateur years, Held pursued the “mercenary instincts” the reviewer loathed and found considerable professional success.
His Career Beyond Amateur Journalism
The “enterprising youth” described in the 1914 review transitioned into the professional world exactly as his early focus on advertisements and subscriptions suggested he would.
* Advertising & Marketing: Walter John Held moved into the corporate sector, eventually becoming a notable executive. He spent a significant portion of his career with Standard Oil of California (now Chevron).
* The “Tradesman” Triumphs: Far from being “ruined” by commercial prosperity, Held became a respected expert in business correspondence and office management. He even authored professional books and articles on these topics, such as The Great Task of Making the Office Pay.
* Literary Footprint: His name survives in the literary world today primarily because of the critique you shared. Because H.P. Lovecraft was the one who “roasted” him in the UAPA’s Department of Public Criticism, Held is immortalized as the pragmatic foil to Lovecraft’s high-minded “gentlemanly” ideals.
The Irony
The irony is twofold:
* Lovecraft, who championed “Art for Art’s sake” and detested writing for money, died in poverty with his genius largely unrecognized.
* Held, who was mocked for wanting to “extract an odd penny,” achieved the stability and professional status that the “commercial” mindset he was criticized for usually aims to secure.
The Bell of Huesca [La Campana de Huesca ]
Xanthiappe, Lagniappe, Inexhaustible, Unexhaustible
This makes for a weak Time Travel fiction. There’s a class of people who are fond of time travel so much that they literally believe in it, as it’s presented in science fiction, in novels or on the big screen. Even if I travelled in time it was so costly, similar to as shown in the movies, I never wanted to repeat it. It wasn’t liberating. It was binding. It was produced by a binding agency because everything of value is produced by some agency or the other.
Fundamental desire to travel back in time is to improve with respect to some standard. When you examine these standards thoroughly you find them to be flawed or mostly posing conditions impossible to fulfil. The desire fades. Desire to travel to a future is to escape the present. It’s being prey to optimism.
It’s from here: the message was sent to my younger self. It was another interlocutor. Online acquaintance on a forum which is now defunct. Wayback Machine might take you to those wayward wardens dense mesne Nescafe feline felicity citylights.
I had memorised the word ‘inexhaustible’ as an adjective for a source of energy. Nuclear energy- in an essay on Wonders of Science. Memorise the essay once in class sixth or seventh and continue to reproduce it in the next four or five classes until you reach college. Or even in college if you would.
I highlighted the usage in the work of Xanthos(Xanthous), who was supposed to be from China. He had used unexhaustible instead of inexhaustible. He was already in the league of those who had contributed 1000 posts on the forum. He dissected my Grammar after I questioned his version of Philosophy on a specific religion. Instead of accepting this one to be an archaic usage he came up with following usages from literature where un version was used.
I don’t know if he won. I made an article with a red colored font with all capitals. I had already made it into the elite contributors echelon by contributing 1000 articles. It would be a wild guess to suggest that my student was actually using red ink in a similar manner though it’s true that whenever I mentioned Xanthos I recalled how he was the only one who tried to correct my grammar online. Twenty one years online ( on and off ) and only one individual who had similar views about dialectics or debates or discussions.
After one forum crashed I discovered the second corner online. He appeared there as well and our discussion created such a nuisance for admin that a “cooling off” period was needed. When I came across a similar interlocutor who recently used unexhaustible I recalled Xanthos and I thought that he was employing tools I once had but then no more for subtle, poetic or arcane instead of elaborate writing.
Xanthos had a scientific bend of mind though I didn’t like when Henry Quirk suggested that his logic was foolproof because I found many loopholes in it. What do I know? Recently I found an article with plenty of ‘formatting’ or style issues which reminded me how I was using “all the wrong reasons” to sound stylistic when I used the word ‘tentative’ beyond its easily exhaustible limit in discussions. Henry Quirk’s program on Voice of Lafayette. A Hobo With A Shotgun which I couldn’t watch even when I had access to it. Der Engie. Very nostalgic.
That is a fantastic linguistic catch! While they sound like they could be cousins, they actually come from completely different sides of the globe.
It’s a perfect example of how two words can end up sounding similar despite having zero shared history—a phenomenon sometimes called phonetic coincidence.
Comparison: Xanthippe vs. Lagniappe
| Word | Origin | Meaning |
|—|—|—|
| Xanthippe | Ancient Greek (Xanthos + Hippos) | “Yellow Horse.” Famously the name of Socrates’ wife. |
| Lagniappe | Quechua → Spanish → Louisiana French | “The gift.” A small extra gift given to a customer by a merchant. |
The Story of “Lagniappe”
Since your students are currently learning about measures and quantities (like the 1 ser equivalent to 933 grams), lagniappe (pronounced lan-YAP) is actually a very relevant concept!
* Etymology: It started as the Quechua (Indigenous South American) word yapay (“to add”).
* The Journey: It traveled to Spanish-speaking Peru as la ñapa, then moved to New Orleans, where the French speakers turned it into Lagniappe.
* The Concept: If you go to a bakery and buy a dozen donuts, and the baker gives you a 13th one for free, that extra one is the lagniappe.
Connecting it to your Students
You could actually use this to bridge the gap between their Sanskrit story and their math:
* In Godohanam, the greedy Chandan wanted more than he was owed and ended up with nothing.
* Lagniappe is the opposite: it’s the merchant being generous and giving a “little something extra.”
* The “P” Sound: You’re right that the terminal “-ippe” and “-appe” create that snappy, percussive ending that makes them sound so similar!
Would you like me to find a few more “horse” related Greek names like Xanthippe to show how the “Hippos” root works in other names?
Xanthous (pronounced ZAN-thous) has a vibrant etymological history tied to the color yellow.
1. Linguistic Origin
It is derived from the Ancient Greek word xanthos (ξανθός), which means “yellow” of various shades.
* The Suffix: The “-ous” part is a standard English adjective-forming suffix (from the Latin -osus), meaning “full of” or “possessing the qualities of.”
* First Appearance: The word entered the English language in the early 1820s (specifically around 1826–1829) as a way to describe things with a yellowish or golden hue.
2. Historical & Scientific Context
The Greeks originally used xanthos to describe a wide range of “golden” things:
* Hair: It was the go-to word for blond or fair hair (as seen in descriptions of heroes like Achilles).
* Horses: It was used to describe chestnut or palomino horses.
* Textiles: It referred to yellow-dyed fabrics.
In the 19th century, the word became more “technical”:
* Anthropology: It was used to classify people with fair hair and light complexions.
* Biology: It appears in terms like Xanthophyll (xanthos + phyllon / “leaf”)—the yellow pigment responsible for autumn leaf colors.
3. A Famous Connection: Xanthippe
If you or your students have heard of Xanthippe, the wife of the philosopher Socrates, her name is a direct compound:
* Xanthos (Yellow/Golden) + Hippos (Horse) = “Yellow Horse.”
* In Ancient Greece, names involving horses were often high-status, suggesting a wealthy or noble family background.
Comparison for Your Notes
| Name/Word | Meaning | Root |
|—|—|—|
| Kezia | Cassia/Cinnamon (Aromatic) | Hebrew (Qetsiyah) |
| Xanthous | Yellow/Golden (Color) | Greek (Xanthos) |
| Jemimah | Dove (Bird/Peace) | Hebrew (Yemimah) |
While inexhaustible is the standard and preferred term in modern English, unexhaustible does exist as a rare, historical variant. Because it follows a natural English word-building pattern (the prefix un- + exhaustible), it has appeared in literature, though it is often considered a “non-standard” or archaic form today.
Here are a few contexts and examples where unexhaustible has been used:
1. Historical and Early Modern English
The word saw its earliest recorded use in the mid-1600s.
* Henry Carey, 2nd Earl of Monmouth (1656): In his translations of Italian works, Carey used “unexhaustible” to describe things that were seemingly endless.
* Early Scientific/Philosophical Texts: Before “inexhaustible” (which is modeled after the French inexhaustible) became the firm standard, writers would occasionally use “unexhaustible” when describing natural resources or the divine.
2. Literary and Philosophical Examples
While “inexhaustible” is far more common in the works of writers like Dickens or Joyce, you can find “unexhaustible” in older or more obscure texts:
* John Milton (attributed or similar period): In the 17th century, prefixes were less standardized. A writer might use “unexhaustible” to emphasize the “un-doing” or “lack of” exhaustion.
* Historical Translations: You may find it in 18th-century translations of Latin or Greek texts where the translator chose a more literal English prefix.
3. Comparison of Usage
| Word | Status | Source/Origin |
|—|—|—|
| Inexhaustible | Standard | From Latin inexhaustus. Used in 99% of modern writing. |
| Unexhaustible | Non-standard/Archaic | Formed within English (un- + exhaustible). Found in the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) but noted as rare. |
Why use “Inexhaustible” instead?
Most dictionaries (like Merriam-Webster and Oxford) list inexhaustible as the primary headword. Using “unexhaustible” today might be seen as a spelling error by your students’ teachers or by AI grading tools, even though it has a legitimate historical pedigree.
For your students, it’s a great “fun fact” of English: that we sometimes have two versions of a word, but the one that sounds more “Latin” (in-) usually wins out over the one that sounds more “Germanic” (un-) in academic settings!
Perclitation, Mobile Vulgus
In the context of the history of English or the BBC series The Story of English, here are the answers to your questions.
1. What is perclitation?
Perclitation (more commonly spelled periclitation) means to be in a state of danger, trial, or hazard.
It comes from the Latin periculitari, meaning “to imperil” or “to put to the test.” While it is an extremely rare and archaic word today, it belongs to that family of “inkhorn terms”—fancy, Latin-derived words that were fashionable during the Renaissance but often criticized for being “nimious” (excessive) or unnecessary when simpler English words like “danger” or “peril” existed.
2. Why did Jonathan Swift dislike the word ‘mob’?
Jonathan Swift, the author of Gulliver’s Travels, was a linguistic conservative who loathed what he called the “barbarous” corruption of the English language. He famously attacked the word “mob” for several reasons:
* It was a “clipped” word: Mob is a shortening of the Latin phrase mobile vulgus (the “fickle common people”). Swift hated abbreviations. He felt that cutting words down was lazy and made the language sound “low” and “clownish.”
* It sounded like slang: In the early 1700s, mob was considered trendy “slang” or “street talk.” Swift grouped it with other abbreviations he hated, like “phiz” (for physiognomy), “incog” (for incognito), and “rep” (for reputation).
* Loss of the “polite” tone: Swift believed that once a language started shortening words, it would eventually lose its structure and dignity. He even wrote a famous letter to the Lord High Treasurer in 1712, proposing an English Academy to “fix” the language forever and stop these “innovations.”
The Irony: Swift’s war against mob failed utterly. He once yelled at a lady for using the word, telling her she should say “the rabble” instead. Today, rabble sounds much more old-fashioned, while mob is standard English!
> Swift found the word mob to be a perclitation to the English language—a dangerous trial that threatened to turn a refined tongue into a series of monosyllabic grunts.
Level N inches
- Raised a ticket for support with Gemini AI text-to-speech engine.
- It reads “Level N” as Level N inches.
- It’s because the bug in the text to speech engine doesn’t let it interpret double quotes correctly if there’s a number preceding the closing double quotes.
- Waiting for the rectification.
George Washington and Cherry tree
If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?
Not all stories are true. I have no pets.
I was reading about Apocryphal/Authentic which are word pairs in the Peter Schmies word classification test when I came across this story as an example of an apocryphal account.
Apography is another interesting word with ‘apo’ ( away from) prefix. It’s a Free Rice level 5 word.
The story of George Washington and the Cherry Tree is the perfect real-world example of an apocryphal tale.
It is a legendary anecdote intended to illustrate Washington’s legendary honesty, but historians agree it almost certainly never happened.
The Plot
The story goes that when George Washington was six years old, he received a small hatchet as a gift. While playing with it, he experimentally chopped at his father’s favorite English cherry tree, barked it badly, and effectively killed it.
When his father discovered the damage, he was furious and asked George if he knew who had done it. George supposedly replied with the famous line:
> “I can’t tell a lie, Pa; you know I can’t tell a lie. I did cut it with my hatchet.”
>
Instead of punishing him, his father embraced him, declaring that his son’s honesty was worth more than a thousand trees.
Why is it “Apocryphal”?
The story is considered apocryphal because it wasn’t recorded during Washington’s life. It was “invented” by Mason Locke Weems (often called Parson Weems), a biographer and cherry-picker of facts (pun intended).
* The Source: Weems first included the story in the 1806 edition of his book The Life of Washington, years after Washington died.
* The Goal: Weems wanted to provide a “moral role model” for the children of the new American republic. He felt that showing Washington as a paragon of virtue was more important than historical accuracy.
* The Irony: It is one of history’s great ironies that the most famous story about “not telling a lie” is, itself, a lie (or at least a fabrication).
Connection to your vocabulary
* Apocryphal: The story is of doubtful authenticity although it is widely circulated as being true.
* Authentic: A story that could be verified by a primary source (like George’s actual childhood diary), which this is not.
* Canonical: This story is “canonical” to American folklore, even if it isn’t “authentic” to history.
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Are these notes existential?
I recall Notes From The Underground. I read that in college. It immediately struck a chord despite being a translated work. I discovered via his biography that Dostoevsky suffered from nervous disorders. Epileptic seizures.
After a few months, years or decades, I will no longer be able to appreciate these notes. What exactly inspired me to write them down. Why did I start publishing again and why did I stop publishing before. I think I agree with “everything is the cause of everything else”.
That offers no clarity.
Gives no immediate credits.
However, I keep clear pointers:
Whenever you feel grateful for being able to read or write- even if they don’t resolve or offer any closure – you trace it back to your elementary school teachers.
In a toxic culture- some of these don’t trace the sources of their own.
For example: I learned counting numbers or basic Arithmetic from my father but he must have learned it from someone else: I failed to observe that gratitude while being made to acknowledge it at every step.
When beginning to acknowledge publishing online I often attributed it to The Einstein Factor by Win Wenger though my parents encouraged me to practice calligraphy in my early childhood and that’s needed to mould basic motor conditioning for writing.
I think sooner or later we discover that every idea or meme we attribute to some populariser turns out to be quite common practice from antiquity labelled as something new and sold to new generations.
I invented verse form using complex words. There were no buyers for that. Subscribers for conventional notes dwindled. Space needed to publish ordinary notes started getting costlier. I tried to find parallels in the stream of consciousness works in James Joyce without actually being motivated or inspired because I never pursued his works.
Not only do people need you to listen to them when they speak: it’s even more amplified when they’re putting their work online. They need agreement alone.
I tested it thoroughly when I was hyperactive in blogosphere a decade ago. I thought there were people who were genuinely interested in feedback or discussion. I was hoping to recreate discussion forums from 2007-8. They were not. Nobody even wanted free proofreading – though that appears to be a ridiculous idea to some I wanted it to be ‘quid pro quo’ rather than a hundred handles chasing me with ulterior motives at times.
How simple is that?
I help out with your typographical errors. If not all of them then maybe one or two. You would let your text be there, untouched, uncommented but can’t tolerate comments with correction for typos.
These are menial jobs which were later replaced by AI or Grammarly. Perdue Owl etc
I tried Gemini for proofreading today.
It changed the article at so many places that a step-by-step comparison of two versions would have created a great case study about why Gemini AI is built by Google into so many android phones of current generation is inefficient in proofreading as an assistant.
Another test was asking simple questions on Astrology. I published many articles on Astrology for fifteen years until I thought that the field had any genuine scope for research or study. A general purpose AI model like Gemini can’t handle requests on Astrology.
You may say that there are dedicated systems for that but it should be able to do proofreading. It can’t.
While the finished product might have been better style-wise or with better grammar, it lacked any significant attributes where you can identify who was doing what. Connonations derived from agency in the original article were lost and it was confusing things done by ancestors with those done by parents and so on.
I was once writing 5000 words of prose on a regular basis. It was needed because there was too much to process. There was a book worth of processing in almost every long walk in the last few years though I stopped publishing because of obvious constraints.
Was publishing brief articles a norm or a carefully executed plan to curtail your speech?
It needs resources. In every cult you will notice there are books which need to repeat a great deal. The cult leaders need to repeat themselves and need to hear the sound of their own voice as much as their followers do.
The younger student arrived first. He was making this noise with the cap of his ballpoint pen. It’s red colored. As soon as he sits he starts struggling to remove the label from it. I drink a glass of water and ask if he did his homework. He didn’t. As usual. Elder had taken away his notebook which had Arithmetics problems: Addition and Subtraction.
“My name isn’t on the pen label that’s why I am removing it.”
Red ink is reserved for evaluation by teachers. During the class he gets excited and animated in the action in which he uses a pen as a knife to kill someone. Whoa!
They’re violent.
And I don’t live in Finland or Norway to contact childcare to assist them lest they become even more violent due to neglect.
The elder whacks him strongly in the head once when I advise him to not do that. He had been making his signatures in a page for a long time. I asked him why he was behaving like an officer.
Now meaning starts pouring in:
The Blabbering Prophet whose name was similar to a monk and later similar to a popular leader but who was in the dire need of childcare:
Refers to the look alike of a growing in popularity leader who was found near the collector bungalow once.
I visited the ration store near the collector bungalow today.
Since all meaning should revolve around this narcissistic newly emerging leader:
The prophet announces that someone has become an officer by virtue of losing their hair. They might have been on their heads or on their chin.
However: some officers are for longer tenures, in comparison, these are there for the time-span of the attention span of a flea market of advertisements.
What it means: if your hair grew back you would no longer be an officer.
It’s very strange if you ask me.
A car driver for an officer is an officer.
The officer for a minister is a minister.
Minister is the minister and then the king or queen by extension.
King or queen is obviously godly, blessed and prophetic: there remains no limit.
Such prophetic brainwashing is a norm here. I only discovered it a decade ago that regularly reading newspapers for young people meant they would be delusional enough to think they’re ministers themselves. Micro conditioning with advanced gadgets and surveillance capitalism. As long as they don’t really test it.
Similarly:
Meaning emerges:
A decade long struggle with hair.
Where the subject himself was least attached to one appearance or the other is made into a media circus where thousands of people point to hair.
As if there’s some bet on whether the subject would keep hair or lose them.
And fake coughing contests win.
Removing hair on the head as well as the chin is against the norm. Done that. Even that’s costly on a regular basis. It’s not just the expense of a trimmer or visiting a saloon.
Keeping the hair on a regular basis is also costly. Before you know : many cults start spreading rumors against you. You don’t qualify for one or over qualify.
The prophet continues: I ask him the definition of an Upanyasa or Novel. It is in the assignment to the elder.
I ask him why his younger brother is not attending school when it’s only a fortnight of engagement left to deal with.
The prophet tells me a tale of two lions. And one lakh rupees. Machine snakes. In the jungle.
What if you need to extend your stories like you see on the TV. A novel is similar to that. A longer story.
He shows me the fake wound created by the red pen on his hand. He quickly removes the hand before I can examine it. I request him to let me closely examine it. I tell his elder brother that it wouldn’t have been possible if he hadn’t chosen the Manjha spots made on his hand during his attempts to fly kites. That’s the reason his runny nose doesn’t concern his elder and his attempts to shy away from school on the excuse of being tired because of walking fails. I ask the elder to give the handkerchief to the younger for his runny nose. He doesn’t. He was wiping the screen of his smartphone.
He has shown a high talent for being a prophet. An actor. Shapeshifting. Kite making and flying. It has been a fortnight since he lost all interest in studies. His calligraphy is going downhill.
He pulls out the Hindi book. Wants me to read “Reedh Ki Haddi” or Backbone again. I tell him that would be boring. That’s cancelled.
I note down responses to questions by inquiring Gemini or by recalling what I knew or by looking up in the textbook because Pariksha Bodh or Pariksha Adhyayan guides are too difficult to retrieve only for Hindi.
Meanwhile, the elder abstains from checking his Instagram feed. Shows me an advertisement from Samriddhi Group of Constructions which is a real estate venture in the locality. A name. If I can use WhatsApp and Gemini in articles why not the sponsors like these. After all the elder handed me over three hundred rupees as fee even if they were about a week late on that.
There was a man on a bulldozer machine in the advertisement. It’s supposed to relate to another popular trend. Infamous trends. Disputed territory. Controversial information.
This is why these students come. For five years. To popularise those who are already popular. To make those prosperous who are already prosperous.
Rich gets richer. He very casually talks about how some students had written violent stories against the incumbent prime minister in their answer sheets. They were slogans popularised by the leader of the opposition. I can’t confirm or deny whether this happened.
But he raised his voice to convey the information to nearby people. To namesakes. To politically interested and motivated. That’s the motivation.
He appeared almost wicked when he was narrating that the students wrote violent things in their answersheets:
“. “
He was grinning.
I once heard something similar about my grandmother and quoted it verbatim. Later I kept regretting if I should have kept an archive. These are the sponsored events during which you create such notes. They seem innocuous. But later popularised as something else. [ Hence I edited it out. ]
A government school. Students of class ninth write against the supreme leader. This must be democracy. Very lenient. I am taxed for thinking and raising my voice.
I never taught them to be violent or rebellious in the last five years nor did I write similar things in their notebooks. Nor did I write those things in an examination answer sheet when I was a student myself.
Why am I being rewarded with these students who play:
Prophets
Rowdy horseplay
Advertisement agencies
Instagram addicts
Bullies
And a lot more except students who can read and write.
There was a stain made by condiments or vegetables on his shirt. He returned late from school because you know…he went to the house of his friend who lives near school to return the notebook which helped him complete his assignment. I ask his full name. He doesn’t remember.
He shows me his sunglasses wearing friend on Instagram. Proudly. He might be associated with the real estate developers.
This is what I am here for.
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Meme, Swag, Swagger, The Meme Machine
I first came across the word meme in the book The Meme Machine by Susan E Blackmore. After two decades it became a buzz word like reel for small byte sized videos.
A summary of The Meme Machine by Susan E Blackmore:
In The Meme Machine, Susan Blackmore takes Richard Dawkins’ concept of the meme and expands it into a “grand unified theory” of human consciousness. Her central argument is that humans are unique not because of our intelligence, but because we are the only species on Earth that functions as a meme machine.
Here is a summary of the core pillars of her book:
1. The Second Replicator
Blackmore argues that just as genes are the first replicators (using our bodies to survive and spread), memes are a second, independent replicator.
* Memes are cultural units—ideas, habits, skills, stories—that use human brains as their “hosts.”
* They don’t care if they are “true” or “good” for us; they only care if they are reproducible. (e.g., a catchy but annoying song or a dangerous “viral” challenge).
2. We are “Meme Fountains”
Why do humans have such massive brains? Blackmore suggests a process called memetic drive:
* Once our ancestors started imitating (the birth of memes), those who were better at imitating had a survival advantage.
* Because being a “good imitator” required a better brain, memes essentially “drove” the evolution of the human brain to be larger and more complex. Our brains were built by and for memes.
3. The Illusion of the “Self”
This is perhaps the most controversial part of the book. Blackmore argues that the “I” or the “Self” is not a biological reality.
* She calls it the “Self-plex”—a massive cluster of memes that have teamed up for mutual defense.
* The idea that “you” are in control is just another meme that helps other memes stay organized and protected. You are not the driver of the machine; you are the machine.
4. Language and Religion as “Viral” Systems
Blackmore analyzes complex systems like religion and language through a memetic lens:
* Religion: She describes religions as “memeplexes” (complexes of memes) that use threats (hell) and rewards (heaven) to ensure they are passed from parent to child.
* Language: Language evolved because it is a highly efficient way to “package” and transmit memes more accurately than simple gestures.
How this Jibes with Your Dream
Your dream is a perfect illustration of Blackmore’s theory:
* The Law: The strange law about the floor is a meme that has infected the “Local Presidents” and is now being forced onto you.
* The Chip: A literal piece of hardware representing the “data” of identity—it’s the meme becoming physical.
* The Vision Test: If you follow Blackmore’s logic, the “elderly man” giving you new glasses is essentially updating your “Self-plex” with a new way to filter the memes you see.
Summary Table: Gene vs. Meme
| Feature | Gene (1st Replicator) | Meme (2nd Replicator) |
|—|—|—|
| Storage | DNA / Cells | Human Brains / Digital Media |
| Transmission | Biological reproduction | Imitation / Teaching / Social Media |
| Goal | Survival of the species | Survival of the idea |
Swagger: bluster : Swag etymology
The evolution of swag from the 16th-century word swagger to a modern social media titan is one of the most successful “rebrands” in the history of the English language.
1. The Shakespearean Birth of “Swagger”
While the root swag (meaning to sway or lurch) is older, William Shakespeare is credited with first using “swagger” to describe a specific type of behavior.
* In A Midsummer Night’s Dream, he writes: “What hempen home-spuns have we swaggering here…?”
* The Etymology: It comes from the Middle English swaggen (to swing or sway), which likely has Scandinavian origins. At the time, it described a person who walked with a defiant, swaying gait—literally “swinging” their body to take up more space.
2. The “Bluster” Connection
As you noticed on Free Rice, bluster and swagger are close cousins.
* Bluster is the noise (loud, aggressive talk).
* Swagger is the movement (the arrogant walk).
Together, they create the “Braggadocio” persona we discussed earlier.
3. The “Swag” Metamorphosis
The journey from “arrogant swaying” to “coolness” happened in distinct waves:
* The Loot (1600s-1800s): “Swag” became slang for stolen goods or “booty.” This connects back to our earlier discussion of the spree (cattle raiding). The “swag” was the heavy bag of loot that made you “sway” as you carried it.
* The Freebies (1960s-1990s): It shifted to mean promotional “Stuff We All Get” (though that’s a backronym, not the true origin).
* The Persona (2000s-Present): In the last decade, popularized by Hip-Hop culture, “swag” (and later “swagger”) returned to its Shakespearean roots but lost the negative “bully” connotation. It became a word for effortless style, confidence, and “aura.”
Dancing light of grace 