A void!

1. I watched a few videos.

2. I had a bath and food was delicious.

3. An old student is back. He paid the dues. He’s the finest among those being tutored at present. He wanted us to also cover GK whereas I insisted on sticking to Grammar and Vocabulary. My experience this year has been to continue focussing on a domain which lasts after the apocalypses. You need food before going to sleep as well as after waking up, in one form or another.

4. Despite an year of hard work the scenario as well as lack of portfolio hasn’t let me get enough number of students to teach to support my living on my own. Debt is a dirty business. Cyclic interest on fundamentally free resources means no one is ever truly free from it. Only people who appear free are either newborns or those who have mastered the art of pretension. Those who have long been at the poisonous game of winning either by hook or by crook. The wee bit of solace that I found after forgetting my past is constantly threatened by my lack of sound financial disposition. Six years ago my PAN card was dropped. I tried this time around and the agent lied through his teeth. The result: I am going to get back the two fifty rupees which might feed me couple of days. Similar incident happened in the year 2018 because the library in the town hall was a monopoly of assistant of librarian and it had too strict laws. It was difficult to get the caution money back and it was difficult to get sustenance for a few days.

5. I met greatest number of people who had some connections to my remote past, in the last few months. It’s after the year 2014 AD. I gained great amount of experience. The concrete proof about variation in heights of people is something I have carried between lifetimes with experiments. Now I look at human resources as “Aatma Pariyojna.” It means everyone working in this office is well versed with fundamentals of The Tibetan Book of the Dead by Padmasambhava and Garuna Purana. Those are the minimum requirements. Shukadev Paramhamsa clearly reveals to King Pareekshita: “you are yourself death of all deaths. What we call death is mere falling away of shape. In the continuum of life, body discards the forms like clothes. The limit of revelation in Hinduism( Geeta and Bhagvata): the simile is suggestive of a Lord or group of Lords. Instead of telling that you carry your entire environment with you : the words merely attach you to ectomorphic image and it gets you into egoic grip of death and convulsions which are akin to high fever, shock of 880 volts or being chased by countless hounds and goons. Buddhism is important in revealing this. And yet: if you don’t know basics you would try to control the dream with same tools : creating realms which are frought with danger. Though Vaasudev Krishna says in Uddhava Geeta: Vidya and Avidya are both founded upon my illusory potency Matrix : and as per another dictum: those who indulge into dark practices fall into pits but into greater pits fall those who practice bright Vidya. The momentum might be positive or negative: it creates veils. You might be in gold or iron chains : it’s still a dream. Dream model: when you’re no longer dreaming. Journey, School, War, Game. Game includes resurrection and healing. School teaches you everything. To learn you need to work . Work might look like comfort or struggle depending upon the requirements.

6. I might have been a slave for uncountable number of years if sanmaargam or true path towards total liberation is a lie. All prophets, devotees and liberated beings never existed in that case.

7. My database has been updated. My bucket list: seeing exact clones. Interacting with me without environmental interruptions. Seeing gods and goddesses with four or more hands and legs. Earning enough merits for a totally sound proof room where I may dwell indefinitely. Time travel at will at all times and being able to record data. Complete freedom from hunger, thirst, fear or shame.

8. What was it: a void.


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