The Dance!

1. After a bit of chat: in the library where they’re doing the final bits of rehearsal as they are going to present the act day after tomorrow.

2. I have drank the whole sky.

I keep drinking it.

Day in and day out,

The new skies keep appearing,

The thirst becomes even more intense,

Nothing can assuage it,

I have seen accounts of poets,

Who exalted the sublime beauty in their words,

I find liberation to be the myth,

It seems like imagination of a mind which is delusion ridden.

3. I thought I understood the dance!

Nobody understands it.

Human mind can experience something different from what it’s accustomed to,

Its quality may change,

But the mystery is eternal,

It’s profound,

Underlying all phenomena,

Its effects are known,

Mostly to convert people into lunatics,

Raving lunatics who laugh hysterically when called names,

Eternally seeking their beloved.

It’s never what one assumes it to be,

Even if you have been acquainted with it for a thousand eons,

It remains beyond any comprehension or use.

It’s what makes both use and misuse possible,

Both living and dead are standing on it,

It’s playing from the sides of victors and vanquished,

Whose side would it take and why?

4. It has no advantages to offer,

It’s not an advantage,

The subjects it touches,

Mostly go mad with bliss,

Bliss: whether small or big is

As good as the experience,

Can’t be compared.

5. The experience can’t be tagged,

Can’t be made into a trophy,

It chooses its subjects only for the negation of the mundane,

Even the most sublime of verses,

Don’t scratch the surface of the dancer!

6. The dancer,

The dance,

And the witness,

Become one.

Else: it’s not the dance.

7. To tell you that you will,

Become a fire,

A mystic one,

Which consumes,




Even that of getting liberated,

You would never trade for this.

And yet: there’s nowhere else to go.

All those who walked before,

Walked through this.

This is the direct knowledge,

They’ve been talking about,

All of them.

8. The individual,

Gains and loses,

Its path and milestones,

And there’s not just one of them,

Paths, milestones and individuals,

In an individual,

Are countless!

The timeless reality takes no account of time bound struggles,

What are countless paths but desires,

And countless milestones?

And countless individuals?

Love for Self dancing as energy.


1. I eat fruits. Fallen on ground.

2. It takes me a lot of time to make-up my mind to write. I would have preferred sitting quietly, watching the setting Sun, the dance, birds frolicking, chirping and returning to nests in various groups.

3. Even in the recreated identity and objective : my efforts tend to fall off on their own. Sometimes it’s pain, at others it’s pain by proxy.

4. There’s a transmuted liquid. It tastes good. It’s elixir according to some texts. It has only given me fanciful dreams. It’s the liquid which plays these games. It gets vital or weak. The liquid has desires. It’s the desire to live and experience.

5. You’re advised to shun pleasure and prolong life. The wisest have advised to fight death. Death is ego. Ego is thought. Thought structures come to regular end. First it were events which seemed fatalistic then it becomes repeated occurrence.

6. The objectives I created as excuse for living are found to be falsehood. The reality asserts itself vehemently.

7. It often seems like: waking up from dream clouds. Again and again. Identities only work until there are users. They’re usually players. The people in the surrounding who have a weak understanding of reality.

8. Even the passing verses of greatest adepts don’t provide solace. This yearning is an all consuming fire. All relations, identities and roles get burnt in it. I tried to fit but there was never any reality to any of it.

9. I get the true meaning of adjective loftily.

10. The silence feels heavenly. I read a bit from Fountain of Ethics in Hindi. Yesterday I read a prologue by Hazari Prasad Dwivedi. On autobiography of Bana Bhatta who wrote Kadambari. He was contemporary to Harsha. Ideas of Catherine : the lady who inspired him to work on completing the book were eye opener. She thought her life was wasted as she was woman. She chide him for being lazy despite being a man. She told him about even European women being shy and unable to work as much as men because of the limitations imposed by the nature.

11. Crescent moon is just above my head. Peeping through three wires. Everything I say or do, unto you, seems to be cheap substitute of some higher existence, as if it was available, right here and now, except it isn’t.

12. Most people keep postponing life. Giving up on even the small pleasures with hope of some heavenly gains. Then it’s too late. I am not one of those.

13. I often think if poetry is more than exercise of imagination. In that sense it’s not taken apart from reality. Imagination is more powerful than reality to give you unreal expectations. Unreal anxieties and sometimes working as foundation for ideas which become reality: our day to day life.

14. Batlings are dancing in zig Zag patterns. Mosquitoes dance. Another twilight. Peace.


The setting Sun is shining brightly. Twenty five birds perched on two pairs of wires. White birds are picking their food from field.

It’s a strange peace. I was listening to someone speak. There’s no complaining at this moment.

In the infinite journey these patterns repeat ad infinitum. Some consider knowledge to be objective of living as it leads to better living and others consider it to be joy.

My objectives were all erased and I became an open vessel for all surrounding voices and life. I became one with all life. Then I recreated objectives to live.

Another Tohu!

1. A newborn piebald puppy is playing with its black mother. I am at Bundelkhand Gaushala Nowgong, Chhatarpur since last two and half hours. I witnessed making of Shivansh compost which has been a routine for me in last month or so. I even participated in turning in some of them.

2. I took rest on a chair. Some kids were busy feeding cows on their birthday. We uprooted some mustard plants which were weeds in the kitchen garden here being cultivated by my companion.

3. Ten people work here to maintain about 470 cows. I found no willing participants to show me around so I didn’t. Though I have learnt to keep my curiosity in check, I learnt it the hard way.

4. A solar light panel was observed. Power is cut for 5 hours everyday here. Compare it with Gandhi Smarak Nidhi Chhatarpur premise where you have it 24*7. I even witness wastage of some electric power over there. They use outdated equipments. Either arguing about giving employment to more people who could work manually or implying lack of a budget. When I started today Gau or cow or Taurus was the yoni of the Kaalpurusha.

5. I played many vocabulary jams, yesterday and today on My ID is 10. I invite you to play with me. Here’s the summary of my recent ranks and scores:

(850, 610, 760, 850, 830, 370, 840, 790,540, 625, 700, 575, 515, 530, 550, 525, 740, 750)

Ranks: 2, 1,1,2,1,4,1,2,3,2,2,2,2,1,1,2,1,1

6. Not many USA players participate on weekends. As if they’re on a job and take leave on weekends.

7. A Tohu Verse:


8. I am inventor of Tohu verse format. Tohu word comes from kabbalistic mystic tradition and it means chaos. Whatever is perceived as chaos is because of lack of awareness. Chaos at one level is intelligence at another and consolidated knowledge at yet another.

Image courtesy: Bundelkhand Gaushala Nowgong Chhatarpur Madhya Pradesh 471001

Image credit: self

Silence of the Birds!

1. Cranes are roaming in the field. Yellow butterflies flutterby. A kingfisher is basking in the Sun on a branch of a tree. Its counterpart comfortably perched down near group of white birds. A bird on top of the hut before me looks for a while at me then looks right. Another blackbird on another branch. A kite is flying in the sky. I haven’t seen Magpie Robin since last few days. The sky has been portraying many visuals worthy of being appreciated.

2. I played five vocabulary jams. Kavita J was one of the top scorers. I intend to play more. In one of the jams where I got a score of 830, the timer of the quiz slowed down so much that we could all score 100 points on most of the questions. On other quizzes it often moves randomly: sometimes where I deserve 100 points I only get 40. Yet: it’s not to dispute superior skill of some players like PC and Claire G. They have been scoring consistently.

3. Filled water for kitchen.

4. Put the tall Gandhi picture back to library.

5. It was put before Gandhi statue for observing silence. The statue was established by some social servants about 70 years ago on Gandhi jayanti.

6. Plucked 54 marigold flowers from Biotic Farm.

7. Sweeped library floor. And verandah.

8. Helped remove chador after assembly ended.

9. Prayers, recitation of poetry and speeches.

Here are the pictures I could capture:

Madhya Pradesh Gandhi Smarak Nidhi Chhatarpur
Library, Gandhi Smarak Bhavan Chhatarpur
Photographer photographed: same guy who had a friend who filled library membership form but didn’t come back: husband of the naturopath
Madhya Pradesh Gandhi Smarak Nidhi Chhatarpur


From being involved as a participant to being a witness it’s a cycle.

Again and again

The participants have no insights

Emotions choke them

The witness has memories devoid of emotions

From nostalgia to recording

Again and again


End of the day!

1. Plenty of vocabulary jams. My ID is 01. I invite you to play with me on

2. Kavitha J and Paul H scored well today on most of the jams.

3. I attended a birthday party, registered some books in library, emptied dustbin ash, helped in cowshed, wrote couple of blog posts, clicked some pictures, filled water and sat down for a while.

Thisaway, or: Thataway

‘No way. Way!’, a d’Verse Quadrille Runaway, wayless, makes his way up dark areaway – to stowaway on a rockaway. Highwayman in jet cutaway strolling past purplish twayblades, reading stolen waybill, notes blond wayward flyaways. Hereaway’s no place for young tearaways, he smiles. Well, leastways we’re both of waygoing lifeways. The above poem is my take […]

Thisaway, or: Thataway

1. Thanks David and d’ verse!

2. My quadrille with 44 words:

Wayward warden dense mesne

Nescafe affects highway my way

Thyway ryeway ardent dentistriatedeterrantucleonasm

Asmeraldalda palindromes in Rome

Omegaye this way that way

Darkness eats essential oils

Boils roil coils recoil

Way lost

In permafrost

Prema roast

Host forgotten

Tenet costs

Tao boasts

Toasts nowayout!


1. Basking in the Sun: 40 minutes.

2. Filling two buckets of water using bicycle for transit : 20 minutes. Believe it or not!

3. Scrapping grass outside library was due for long. Burning stray pieces: 20 minutes.

4. A man walking with fast paces only asked for confirmation of what he knew: “that lady who has a hair cut…” Had a file in his hand.

5. Venus had Jaminee Atmakaraka post for a stage where a big drama took place. It was handed over to caring mother Moon who is entering its house in Cancer with Punarvasu. The next Atmakaraka is going to be Mars again who indicates struggle. The police, martials and athletes and the mathematicians will be in focus now along with revolutionaries.


1. Heard many horn sounds as I was moving out of house.

2. A man on bicycle had a white ream of paper…just behind him a fast moving vehicle with BJP district president plate on it. It’s an old pattern. Another Press vehicle.

3. Snooker game bill board with Russian models.

4. IPTA number three handed me over script to put it in library. The director was on the back seat.

5. Last night I handed it over to director just before closing the library. His bag and water bottle as well.

6. The first page of script has names from voterlist on its backside.

7. How’s it for the first scene of a play?

Keeping the thread as small as possible. Why can’t I ever exclude political parties from these?

Twilight Again!

Birds are returning to their nests. Parrots mostly. Eleventh Moon is shining in Taurus just above my head. Sounds of prayers from nearby temples and mosques.

The granary has expanded a bit. Not as much as needed yet. I picked up the scrapped grass and threw it away. A trolley full of pigeon pea is resting before me to be unloaded here.

The conversation with Nadine was uplifting yesterday. Semantics, delusion and further delusions: then their shattering one by one has been the story of my Odyssey here on WordPress. While the poet of highest order disappeared and wouldn’t resurface no matter what: another fish in the cave seems to want to swim to that side of shore. And yet another won’t change her profile picture even after four years. Or has it been lesser. They create black holes. Then bit of scaling. Then return to black holes.

If this Faatima was that Faatima: she won’t believe that one morning in 2016 i hardly had anything else but her words to hang onto. Some scarecrow images. And her words as unicorn images of a safe haven which leads me where?

Here! This is the culmination of all my searches. All my seeking and journey. Nectar of immortality. Don’t tell them they would banish us. Then there is three of us…four of us… countless trillions of us…how lovely to be nobody…

How fluid to watch the dance and play the game.


Score Analytics!

1. Played 13 vocabulary jams on on 16.1.2021 and 17.1.2021.

2. Here’s the summary of ranks i received:


3. Today I received second rank only once. Yesterday I couldn’t receive first rank even once.

4. Summary of my scores:














5. As you can observe: except in three instances, my scores have all been in excess of 700.

6. I reached the highest score of 840. First rank still eluded me as it was attained by Stephen D.

7. Stephen D. has been a consistent player and top scorer in recent days. Claire G, PC and Vishnu Ram came to be known in September-October. PC and Claire score in excess of 900 easily. I strive for that. It might take me practice of a few months to reach that mark and maintain it consistently.

8. Though rare I have received score in excess of 900.