1. When Sun goes South: the West is right. That which came later is right. Tradition is wrong. When Sun goes South- compass points to traditional but you don’t need it. When Sun goes South– you are righteous.
2. There were 13 dogs. I had just crossed Maharshi Pranavananda Vedic Research Institute’s gate when I observed them. They were all basking in the Sun. Only one of them had a belt around its neck. It was black. Not the belt, the dog. The belt was brown.
3. There’s about a score of buses and jeeps combined together inside the stadium. It’s election day. I observed a card lying on the grass as I was bowling. I inverted it to see the face: it had four stars: an extra joker. Nearby you see shards of a broken liquor bottle. Three white buses belong to Udan group. They have Chhindwara and Pipariya written on their back.
4. The passage just outside the badminton court was wet because of the water tank. It was a relief to get the SouthWest QRF ramp for bowling practice. I saw people playing football, walking and chatting. The next thing you know: all fit people are declared unfit by the draconid institution and we are locked up inside houses only to be fucked up by ill gutka shakers and goons. It has happened before it might happen again.
5. I was beaten by a black commando and a bunch of police officers near Maria Mata High School for not wearing mask. I am one of the most healthy males around. I have not been to any doctor in six-seven years except for root canal. I don’t fall ill. Yet: I was beaten while I was going to library. They didn’t hear my logic but rather mocked me being a reader. To say that I was admitted to military or to this or that group is pure bullshit in a country where government siezes your documents and makes you helpless in the name of helping you by spying on you with the tools you use to educate yourself and others. I didn’t wear mask and I was harrassed by local mafia. Politicians and their pets are all same.
6. Corona might be a religion for some people. As people wear tilak or yarmulke they started wearing a mask to serve scaremongers. A time will come when this phase along with AIDS and others will be recalled as the darkest phase of human evolution. Ayurveda practicing people along with medical people had huge incomes and a hidden world war was fought with weapons of biological massacre. All people who first let population be exploded allowed it so that population reaches to the normal. I don’t follow Corona. Nobody died near me from Corona. Breathing ailments and such were available for medical people who make their living on them since forever. Why invent a new disease? Within a wink I would have dissolved this pathetic existence if it were upto me. Hence it’s not upto me.
I just raised 82000 grains of rice on Freerice! For every answer you get right, 5 grains go to the UN World Food Programme. Play it here: https://freerice.com/apps
1. 405 views and 27 visitors. Unforeseen unprecedented. It was the peak performance of my Google Blogger blog in the year 2012 when I wrote some posts about dollar bill being illuminati conspiratorial pyramidal symbolic binding note.
2. I don’t know if it was the romantic failures post but it’s certainly connected to blogger’s World.
3. If I knew what creates 405 views : I might repeat that kind of behaviour but I don’t. It’s HUGE in terms of WordPress.
4. It might make me rich if I can keep it up and learn to monetize this blog.
5. I am unable to decide if I should play vocabulary quiz or watch Supernatural finale.
6. I was drowsy when I reached stadium. Most of the buses have gone. I had a walk with a friend and we enjoyed a chat.
1. Brijesh met after the last time announcement: “it has become very black…now let it become brighter.” The comment was loud, like a jibe, to a Sardar who was standing near a JIO stall just besides Veena Omkar’s newly furnished house. This time around we shaked hands. He asked for the contact number but I wanted to ensure if he recalled the event in which he became a bridge on which I drove my bicycle. He nodded and said there were many fond memories. Then upon being asked he told about his gas agencies, biggest gym in city and some other enterprise. It means he’s an entrepreneur. I once borrowed a book on magic from him. We were in class third or fourth then. I also went as far as bus stand : walking alone to buy a book on magic in my early childhood. I was as adventurous and fearless then as I am now.
2. The chapter on Albert Einstein was named “A truly beautiful mind…” It had some points where Einstein was funny or humane but it was mostly a gifted individual: a Scorpion researcher and a Piscean cusp. His exalted Venus and Debilitated Mercury are highlighted even in his birthday: 5 as root number and 6 as life path number. Five is ruled by Mercury whereas 6 is ruled by Venus. Methodical uneven.
3. Got my head shaved. It was a relief. I saw a book by Dalai Lama on introduction to Buddhism and Tantric meditation. I also read some portions from Shri Aurobindo’s biography. The barber was emphasizing the importance of earning at least three hundred rupees per day and I told him I was not getting that much. He also didn’t have any income yesterday.
4. Spotify advertisement: mutual funds and premium versions of the app. One of the ads has so many uses of “we” by a single subject that you feel bored. Then as advertisement is over: infomercial telling you about there being no advertisement for next thirty minutes takes another ten seconds : the ad before the ad opened also took the same amount. Ultimately: ads ad nauseum. But there’s no exception.
1. After taking the permission to enter into the kitchen to drink couple of glasses of water, I drank it and cleansed the glass: then, before coming to library I reported it to the secratary who was showing some seeds to the head of the trust. I had to report it because it was necessary. If working in corporate culture taught me anything it was : showing off and reporting every little odd thing you do. It keeps you relevant else you are forgotten sooner than you think. Her Capricorn smile made me feel that it was not required to report but I felt I did the right thing. It was a lot of garbage as theater guys don’t do any cleansing. You find scraps of paper, newspapers, cold drinks, coffee pouches and whatnot inside the library. It’s a good riddance that they are gone for now but they’ve left a lot of stuff behind. They might be back with another show.
2. Shri would attend the class only by 12 which meant I could sweep and register a few books and do this quick post as well.
3. The police and other staff members related to election commission have surrounded the stadium and school number one. Every square foot has police and it’s crowded. It’s the month of Scorpion: the Sun along with Venus is debilitated in the Samaya but Moon is exalted with the North node in the sign of Bull. The South node is exalted in the sign of Scorpion dictating terms with retrograde rays from Jupiter’s own sign which is also the Jaimini Atmakaraka in the sign of Scorpion in navamansa.
Library: facing West! Left is Right. Right is Wrong.
4. I had a cold bread pakoda outside the first classroom. The fruit salad was meagre and tasteless: a waste of twenty rupees. I recall days when I used to have fruit salad in Cognizant auditorium or in Minal residency. My good fortune was too short lived so I need to keep going back to memories.
5. Poha thela was crowded with policemen and it would have taken me ten minutes before I got a plate inside my body.
6. Alternate nostril breathing and twelve balls: only this much time was available though I had a good breakfast in morning.
7. Where have the vocabulary jammers gone is a mystery to me. I plan on watching a science fiction movie but then change it because not many decent movies are available.
8. I need to buy a lock for library. Another twenty or forty rupees of expenditure. I bought two disposable pens worth five. It’s important to find time to play vocabulary quiz on Free Rice site.
1. Since Piyush went to his village with his mom: I was left with extra couple of hours. I tried playing vocabulary jams but my getting first or second ranks consistently as there were only 12 to 13 players on most of them made me bored.
2. I decided to watch a science fiction movie. I put the phone to charge and got some rest. As I was taking rest I thought about finding my romantic thread and publishing it here. It’s a story which makes me wiser everytime I write it. It’s made of delusions.
3. Now I can say: I created this blog to anonymously continue to publish things which were not related to previous blogs. Soon I gained enough confidence to integrate it with previous blogs.
4. Gaslighting reached to an extent in my life that offline and online was same. People mostly disliked me or they had a very odd way of expressing their fondness : I am infamous. Despite being humble as far as my possessions and income are concerned.
5. Police, shamans, tantrikis and healers know me the most though not in that very order. Secret police is always after me.
6. I can say: Gandhi took at least sixty years of his life to reach a clarity where he could publish about his most private affairs: like sleeping with his grandniece as an experiment for his celibacy (citation Wikipedia) : not that it was liked by his closest staff members. Not that it was really a success but mere admission was an accomplishment in an indian subcontinental setting.
7. I achieved that by the age of 35. And I understand that Gandhi was very popular. I am not as popular. Perhaps I am known only to a fraction of number of people who knew Gandhi : yet I think there was no indian with a greater courage to admit one’s foibles. To clarify: I didn’t sleep with any grandniece or niece or such but I was able to publish online most of my private life without hesitation.
8. I think Buddha’s four noble truths: like the four noble truths in Jainism emphasize on “admission of problem” in the first step. Admission of guilt or shame or confessions is important. The first step to solve a problem is to recognise the problem.
9. Albert Einstein said that he would take 55 minutes to find the problem : its root and then only 5 minutes will be enough to solve it. If an hour is given to solve a problem : which approach is better than it?
10. Confessions; as in Christianity and the first noble truths in Jainism as well as Buddhism are regarding nature of problems: psychoanalysis emerges from it.
11. One fundamental problem is: religion is based on a foundation of there being more life, goodness, light and positivity than negativity. Is that true? That’s upto you to decide. Same with Science.
12. When I was depressed: I kept an online journal on my laptop. There: some hackers caught hold of it and took me to a shaming room merely to make me feel guilty. In the long run they all failed. I came out stronger and healthier. I can say: I did a good thing but: you shouldn’t do it unless you’re hundred percent sure: and you can never be. Jean Jacques Rousseau to Gandhi to Tolstoy there have been countless thinkers who published about their character. It’s putting yourself in the hands of angels and demons. I assumed: since they were hackers they must be wise enough to understand that all religions are make believe dreams. They have their values but not any ultimate value.
13. Now: coming back to the thread of romance as it’s Autumn. I am a bachelor. I never married nor am I planning to get married. Moreover: I never had any sexual intercourse in my life. I produced no offsprings nor do I plan to produce any.
14. I did have some hanky-panky but it was once when I was too young: seven years old: must be angels or demons experimenting on poor kids. Second it was when I was working: I thought an obese girl could become a supermodel by the power of love. I was wrong. I invited much negativity later on and suffered which wasn’t directly related to hanky panky but the parting girl said: “you used me.” I told her:” we both used each other; don’t mislead the narrative.” Which version of narrative remained with her out of our dillydallying is not known to me.
15. It took me ten years to regain my fitness. My family members had left me penniless to imagine of any romance. I could only romance with sweepers, maid servants, grandmothers and like. Romancing essentially means: taking your loved ones to dinner etcetera and then to bed. I couldn’t afford any of that. Romance was dead for me. What remained was: watching porn and chatting with girls or women who were either a scam or bots. That also consumes energy but teaches you faster about Nirvana.
16. Online affairs were later: after my awakening: therefore they merely sounded like “forced creation of narratives by multiple parties.”
17. One peculiar nature of these affairs was their resurgence: despite there being no hope they kept coming back. Love was always there. It was romantic love I was talking about. It became a stronger and stronger yearning towards reality or godhead but it had many affairs.
18. In witness sense: it was Mara’s net. In a positive sense: it was my way out of depression.
19. I kept reading some poets: realizing that I could neither be loyal to any one of them nor I was seeking any commitment. I realized after a while that they were mostly looking for people who might inspire their verses on which they might make money by selling books.
20. I was too cut-off from money making business because I had signed up for spiritual stuff which advocated minimalism. It became too much after a point when I realised that spiritual and material were not that far removed from each other and being too much of a minimalist wasn’t possible with the people I was living with. They didn’t value renunciates.
22. I would marry someone who is: absolutely attractive, absolutely intelligent, absolutely absolute, an equal to me in every aspect but not more than me. Someone who can put all noises, ghosts, hungry people and magicians and goblins to silence forever. Only two of us dedicated to each other without any progenies or world. No deformation, no decay, no death or aging. Unless that’s a given: I need no romance or marriage. Jerking off to Korean, Chinese, Spanish porn is excellent! As long as that’s feasible. I might write an article convincing you about the merits of porn. It’s already exalted in Indian temples and scriptures. Why not admit it clearly. I was contemplating whether to write a long article about my porn history or my romantic failures. I chose the latter.
23. With this current demigod status: marriage is impossible for me. Even a decent romance needs me to be at least as rich as a Bill Gates. That’s also next to impossible. And think about it: to earn wealth to realize that you haven’t conqured aging, decay and diseases like Vallalar or other Jnana Siddhars did: it’s better to seek that completely rather than to search for a romance which is mostly : obese girls trying to sell their novels(or books of poetry) or someone taking pity on you.
24. Online romance: I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw Izza Ifzaal writing verses on my private life. Whether it was a synchronicity or a delusion or dark net or her clairvoyance: it created temporary romance which I couldn’t afford to. Then I found many people writing about me or trying to attract my attention one way or the other. Some clearly admitted that I was an inspiration for their articles. That made me feel important like never before! Things haven’t changed in five years. I am only more aware of traps : booby or otherwise: then Kristina, Shine Ferrer, Devika, Nandita, Sameera, Rishuu, smouldering words: they all seemed to use either my gullible nature or something else to make me believe that there was some romance somewhere. Devika’s case was most strange : not because I merely wanted it to be: Shine Ferrer chatting with me on Facebook talked about her while I was reading Izza Ifzaal and I clearly told her that she was out of my league. But as a mystery worth being searched : I tried my best to investigate and found that she was also looking to make a living off of me like rest of them: like my parents and siblings. She along with Varjak Baby taught me some lessons about being selfish.
25. That sums up honorable mentions online. Offline it was: Swati in college who was a delusion as per my friends. Monika and Richa are happily married and they’re as happily married as Ravneet is. These are real names. I spent considerable time with those two because Saurabh was involved. Saurabh the Vyasa had incarnated to teach me a lesson or two. He’s happily married too.
26. The school life had co-ed but nuns of Christ were too harsh to allow you any romance. Rest of it was covered by my parents. They still take sexual potency pills but ensured that their children had no romance in their lives.
27. There used to be flying planes with notes on them: love notes. That was the extent of romance. Being a nerd helped as long as you performed. In my brief corporate life: the seniors always had more lucrative packages. As told before: the design by archons here is to make more and more healthy males to fight for a handful of girls. Win the trophies. By my reckoning: I see at least two hundred males per single beautiful girl and twenty to twenty five males per mediocre girls.
28. Ranjana had asthma. She worked out in gym and married to a Sikh who worked hard to build his body. They had both settled in USA. I didn’t find her to be attractive. She was from Bengal and Bihar. She was educated and we shared a lot of time with each other as co-workers. She told me that IAS officers in Bihar were willing to marry her. I couldn’t believe my eyes. That’s the kind of society we have made. It’s a pity. Perhaps it was always like this: a make-believe. I am happy that I was saved. I was made a demigod and in time I might gain pure body of gnosis and bliss.
29. If anyone: whose names are given in this article feel offended: let me know in the comments and their names would be removed. If they want to sue me: I am already penniless : merely getting my day-to-day food by teaching tuitions which are hard to come by despite my being a demigod. If you are still interested in taking revenge: let me know when you are going to strike.
1. Woke up drowsy. Kids didn’t turn up for class. Came early to Shatabdi ground. Shat means hundred and abd means years: the ground was created commemorating hundred years of something.
2. Bowled sixty times or ten overs with music: absolute pleasure after three vocabulary jams. Some Gujjars confirmed if it was my own ball I was practicing with.
3. I couldn’t witness Chelpa birds today. No miracles today. I need to write a good tohu verse on Blogger’s World.
4. Where have players on vocab jam gone? I scored 11211. There were only 12 to 13 players per game. Played Free Rice quiz as well.
I just raised 81000 grains of rice on Freerice! For every answer you get right, 5 grains go to the UN World Food Programme. Play it here: https://freerice.com/apps
1. I am relaxing after a nice meal. It’s going to be another class soon. The last class was fun and the theatre guys are shifting to auditorium which means I need to sweep the library, though they left couple of packets of incense sticks after I complained about their rapid using up of mine. I also need to put couple of pens over there.
2. Among other things we talked about how beautiful and majestic an animal an owl is. I love most birds just because they can fly but when it comes to owls: everything about them is mystical.
3. Dhaniram was again spotted near Ambedkar circle. He has shifted his work office from Galla Mandi Ramleela maidan to stadium and aforesaid place.
4. I put only 30 balls in morning. The Shatabdi ground was overcrowded. Obnoxious looks from the coach were bound to happen because I was compelled to use that arena for bowling. The stadium is not available yet.
5. Yesterday evening I had a walk in Shatabdi. It was quiet. I was playing vocabulary jams and listening to music from films when Piyush called. We had a chat masala and I need to pay him ten rupees back as I didn’t have the change. I paid hundred to Vandana. I was paid by employers but now as one of the students in the morning batch is leaving it means I would work for five rupees per hour. It’s to keep the machine running. She might be back in December.
6. I am getting rankings in top five in jams. I received top ranks today morning. Weather is pleasant now.
7. She spotted my passport in one of the books I had donated to the library by chance. It expired in 2018.
8. I practiced alternate nostril breathing in stadium. News is unreliable these days.
I just raised 80000 grains of rice on Freerice! For every answer you get right, 5 grains go to the UN World Food Programme. Play it here: https://freerice.com/apps
1. I had charity food after a long time today: in one packet there were four pooris and some dry brinjal potato curry which was tasty though I wasn’t very hungry. Whether it was orchestrated or not: they reached the Gandhi Smarak Bhavan the moment I reached and like the day before when I had introduced Ashutosh Thakur to librarian I had to introduce these people to the staff. It was their father’s punyatithi. One year since he departed. It was also a Punyatithi or birthday for Tiwari Ji, Sardar Patel, Indira Gandhi : I was invited to stay for the memorial after the class but I needed rest.
South
2. The stadium is reserved for election. I don’t know if it would only be Sunday. I bowled five overs in morning and about three overs in the evening: a total of 50 balls today. In a way my body is recuperating and getting rest which I might not have allowed it if ground was available.
3. Nothing spectacular. Plenty of rest. I need to play some vocabulary jams now.
Dancing light of grace 