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For a few pennies more!

1. Missus Rathore told me that she was only going to pay hundred rupees. Why? Because her child stopped coming to my class and didn’t let me know for four days. Further: she would only pay by the month end. It’s like this: leave whenever you want to. Your tutor calls you but you don’t attend the call and when you finally decide to pay him after a fifteen days delay: it’s as per your whim: counting from the day you decided to leave the tuition. Wasn’t she in on it? If not: she should take a greater responsibility for her child’s whimsical behavior. And though her child said that it was his classmate slowing him down: it was their combined decision to give up on the class. He was the one who brought the weaker student. My fault was to pay enough attention to the weaker one. To teach them to write proper Hindi and English and to teach using a reference book which is used by the Central Board of Secondary Education. They were on some different mission and three months was enough long to understand their aptitude. It happens. If my fifty rupees are eaten by a party : it only proves that I can be conned. Repeatedly.

2. I bowled 40 times in morning. It was an exercise good enough to make me sweat. As I was entering the class: a baby who had seen a monkey as per her mother’s account was running towards her elders with a smartphone in hand. I recalled Ramana Maharishi’s ‘monkey’ episode(vervet) from his collected conversations. I AM THAT I AM.

3. All the advocate of ethics who come running after you to make you retire from your comfortable abode of peace and to strive after pennies are never found around when it’s time to pay remunerations. A moustached guy was asking for mustard oil. For no fault of moustached guy or oil merchants. King Bhoja and Gangoo the oilman.

4. There was trimming of branches of trees everywhere by the electricity board. These branches were obstructing wiring.

5. The mature student who took part in the discussion on hereafter wanted to rest today.

6. I never thought that my writing would be dedicated to collection of pennies. To count the rice grains donated and to count the number of jobs where I meet with same people: who lack discipline to learn and who are unwilling to pay enough money. There is no subsidy for internet recharge. No free instantaneous PAN card creation. No real jobs which pay you for your skills. Only exploitation. My mother and her colleague as well as so called father exploited my services : in their school and for other purposes : giving pennies as well as calling names in loud voices. They are already roiling in their filth. More to follow them soon. I asked them to keep business of education separate from business of cleavage. They couldn’t.

Posted on by dancinglightofgrace

Death is dead!

1. It’s a strange place I have reached. Whereas the most abstruse of spiritual and political topics seem like back of my left hand: my everyday life is a life of dire poverty. My net worth is three hundred and twenty rupees and I am waiting to receive my due fees from three parties.

2. World Food Programme received Nobel Peace Prize: though they are as rigged as Cricket Matches : I am happy that some charity does happen on their behalf : and since I spend some time everyday-playing Free Rice game: I feel like I deserve some rice when I eat it. Not because what I have donated recently is enough to feed many children: it’s a meagre one kilogram : but I am extremely popular. Despite being hidden. Despite being a blogger who has only hundred followers who were not bought by liking in return or by using flattery: I did wait for the count to reach to 100 from 90. By then, all previous ailments, which are merely memories were dropped. Blogger’s World survived but didn’t thrive. A Blogger blog which had utmost honest accounts of how Corona originated (it originated when I was enjoying the Chinese porn): survived. I am happy for World Food Programme. I do need some institution or organization which really does what it says.

3. Maria Mata Convent High School doesn’t. Its T is italicized. Mafos. Logos. All the same. Red Cross? I don’t know. I was a star advertiser : then I was not eligible as a teacher. I was eligible to be butchered collectively in another school: Sanskar Public. The main problem is: I don’t understand why such a prestigious institution encroached such a big amount of public land on a road. Secondly: the same was done by Choubey Nursing Home. And after many months of news reports in 2018 : nothing ever happened. Voices are suppressed : efficiently. I would give you an offer you won’t be able to resist. Marlon Brando/Al Pacino/Robert De Nero? It doesn’t matter. You’re a Warner Bros: stay mum. Anand Hero? Yarmulke? It’s time to shine. Put a drunk man near collector bungalow. What is news? Even collector bungalow encroached public road. Do you have courage to bulldozer that land? Or is it only poor people like me?

4. Sampat had problems with my cleaning the field. My neighbors had bigger problems. And why? Because it’s always a problem. Sampat didn’t know that her name means what her grandchild’s name meant: “vaibhav” : opulence. It was the same name which was inserted into me when I was dying after having my heart stopped. Satyam was present in two such episodes with me. Galla Mandi: Ganesh: and then playing the ball in the academy. Jai Tripathi called it out like the child who saw emperor’s clothes: is it a bhoot bungalow sir? Sampat only had a colony of ghosts in her house. She was rude then and even more rude in parting. She was the second lady after the secretary of Gandhi Smarak Nidhi who employed me: but they were never as clear as I was: they mixed money with cleavage while I wanted them to keep them distinct. I was supposed to be paid for my honest labours. The kids I taught didn’t let me teach. They were mostly nuisance makers. I did my best but in the end: you are not being paid because we had to spend time preparing tea for you. You know what: I had five ghosts in my house: they channeled countless ghosts and you’re not new. Maybe you’re more connected to elite of the town: being a Chaturvedi and all. Who is Bhajju Goswami? Is he same as Gyanesh Or is he a different version. He was more of a friend and we did play chess but he disappeared.

5. It has been six months. I was beaten by a black commando and police. Why? Because I was walking towards a library. I was composing with a slut who thought she was a goddess. I was commenting on heir apparent winking at cheat apparent. The policeman didn’t know where Gandhi Smarak Bhavan is and yet had a right to beat me. Isn’t it logical that since that beating didn’t change the disease and didn’t control the community spread and the Maximilian Muhammad farci: all draconid constellation rulers be soon brought to justice? Will it make me happy that same treatment is given to president, prime minister, or all goons? Will it make me happy that all traces of this civilization disappear for good? I really don’t know the root cause. What can I say? I see beggars vying for attention all around me.

6. What did I learn this year? It’s Autumn. Now deciduous trees mean something else: they don’t make me recall whores. They merely tell me that I have sacrificed myself as many times for the Truth as the leaves falling from trees. I see crows, pigeons, mules, bulls, pigs, dogs and humans: they all have a different meaning to me. This was the greatest year ever!

7. I still long to see thousand hooded serpent. Giant lizards. Aliens. Grays. Sirians. Vulcans. Orions. Etcetera. Where are my countless clones? Exact replicas with whom I may spend time without noise? How long do I need to serve logos before I am rewarded with a noise proof room where I have perfect control for as long as I need it. If no such thing exists: logos is powerless and fake.

8. Where are gods and goddesses with thousands of heads. Not the mystical version of people cooperation. No. If you rattle psyche of children for aeons : by telling them stories about them: you should show something real. Instead: you invent new ways of torture:

9. Celibacy. Sexuality. Marriage. Ethics. Parents. Police. Neighborhood. Shamans. State. Taxes. Outcastes. Incomplete education. Sleep deprivation. Malnutrition. Adulteration of food. Using electricity, internet and other wiring to adulterate music of spheres. And add goons, maafia as well as Mahajan to that: if everyone is indebted to some greater Lord: why do I need to bear the cross everytime?

10. Advertisement carry more knowledge than news reports. Imagination is more powerful than knowledge. I was a slave. Then I thought I was free. Then I was initiated by another Inder who imposed some impossible to fulfill conditions like a diary: what a fake institution. Then: back to Nayanmars who claimed perfect enlightenment merely by chanting omamashivaay. Here precedence was given to rudraksha bearers by primeval Lord? What’s so special about a tree, stone, hair, bones, DNA? Anki and Anlil.

11. Amitabh. Western Buddha verse. Piyusha Patel: only person who asked me earnest philosophical questions in the last year. Only a few meetings. Mere confirmation that I hadn’t forgotten the names and teachings: Jiddu, UG, Eckhart, Nisargadatt, Buddha, Padmasambhava, Nanaka, Rama, Vaasudev, Vyasa, Ramananda, Muhammad, Moses, Ramalinga, Patanjali and Gandhi. Foundation course: Shriram Sharma. Osho. Kripaluji. Satya Sai Baba. Baba Ramdev. I wondered if Asharam, Ram Rahim and Rampal etc were merely adept actors or something of order of solitary confinement did happen to me. I was deprived of sleep, food and given shock treatment by gray aliens in the darkest nights. Let it be known to all who read: Death is dead. Covid is dead. Dick Laurent is dead.

Posted on by dancinglightofgrace

To Call A Spade, A Spade!

1. I had a bath and a meal. I bought a red colored tennis ball worth fifty rupees ( ‘Bailey’ company )from Chetan Sports and Science gallery.

2. My student who couldn’t join me for the evening practice today had recommended to buy one costing twenty rupees but it was not available on that shop. I practiced with the synthetic ball for 40 iterations, then I decided to buy the tennis ball because otherwise the owner of the ball would have come collecting taxes. I counted sixty balls in total. Morning routine should have catching practice and evening routine should have bowling practice. As a general rule: if you don’t own a bat you shouldn’t aspire to bat. Most of the kids who join the academy pay thousand rupees entry fee, then they need to pay five hundred rupees per month, expenses for kit, bats and bowls are additional.

3. Needless to say: only elites play Cricket. Children of Mafia, Illuminati and land owners. If I am allowed anywhere near them it’s a privilege with much vigilance. The secret police is always inside stadium and around schools. The previous such unlock happened when it was assembly election. As soon as the election was over they again brought curfew like situation. This relaxation: freedom to roam around and play while I can only manage to drink half a kilogram of milk everyday for only next ten days with what I have: is because of the elections. People should feel that Madhya Pradesh government which came in power by buying candidates, and the greatest tyranny since Indira Gandhi as well as city goons are keeping well by only spitting once or twice gutka shakers unite.

4. Plastic got banned. Gutka got banned. Porn got banned. Ladies are safe until media pursues a suicide case. Pranav Pandya: the head of Gaytri Pariwar was facing charges of sexual assault and the case was on fast track. Now nobody knows what happened to the case. Now all of a sudden it’s a deluge of sexual assaults in news : as if all the rapists have been unleashed together.

5. To have yourself inspected : to be observed like I have been observed might have sounded like a real thing. All charges fall if I have a little of music. And it tells me how discordant and full of puss are those mouths : air coming out from which is no better than fart. Useless pathetic faces which have no other job but to encroach other’s property, violate their rights and to exercise unrighteous Dominion over others. People who use all devices merely to try mind control by depriving you of sleep, food and basic security. Such manipulation is from people who are already in hell of their collective making but think that they are in heavens. I kept wondering : the very people whom I try to educate and enlighten: the people very near to me who pretended to like me and even adore me were behaving like enemies : then it was all of them. I was absolutely infamous and for no reason but because I was being myself. I couldn’t have been anything else. This was my destination: to call a spade, a spade.

Posted on by dancinglightofgrace

Intifada

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Posted on by dancinglightofgrace · 3 Comments

Afterlife Dreams!

1. It’s afterlife and yet it seems like previous life. Miranda was the keyword in my ears even before I had begun to watch the Black box: it’s one of the best science fiction movies. Thereafter I had a most stunning series of dreams. I still like to sleep and dream when music allows. As above so below.

2. The madman and other men were present on breakfast table. I had an additional samosa. It is a good thing that I have money to buy milk and tennis balls. I can practice balling, running, walking etcetera until it’s another lockdown. I am happy to have deciphered most of the mysteries of time but it’s like conches and grain particles beside the ethereal shrine of Bliss and gnosis. I look forward to day when I can afford all that I need to buy: immortality and fountain of youth are not among them.

Posted on by dancinglightofgrace

Loss all around! Be happy!

1. All three of the boys who came from the underprivileged community, paid meager sum for labors, dropped today with about five hundred rupees still to be paid to me.

2. I couldn’t teach them even three complete lessons of the English Grammar with Holy Faith International reference book. They can neither write Hindi nor English. Besides: they created multifarious conflicts. Firstly: the student who joined first couldn’t learn words. Couldn’t continue to write in his notebook, the words which I taught him. Secondly: he let reluctantly join a boy from his neighborhood after him and what followed was a series of Shamanism events. Then: once he said: ” why are you turning away from women, have you kept roza(fast?)”

3. In red shirts, two of them didn’t recognize me near New colony. Before that the first one had disappeared after the Lolo drama by Vikram and company.

4. Were they merely playing the role in coherence movie simulation. As I asked him about the event later: he didn’t recall wearing such a shirt. The first one was most proud. He showed it the most the day when he was putting the tyre on the burnt coconut outside the door and refused to take the class. The second one wanted to practice but was consumed by something else or I misread him. The third one was brought by him but disappeared without paying fees when I was being killed by multiple hounds inside and outside house. Their joining and leaving my classes is made so comfortable because I don’t go back to ask questions. Like that neighborhood uncle who was promising a thirty thousand rupees batch with half of that for me and its code had some 100 rupees note. Rubbish as usual. Suckers attended the classes two three days without paying zilch for it. Feeding myself needs my merits and money but taking my energy and life force needs nothing: just come and show some teeth or false promises or start beating an autorickshaw driver with a swafi or was it Swati?

5. I bowled 40 times. Equivalent to 1000 steps of run. I walked a few rounds. This is all I am left with for Chandla uncle came sniffing my back here. He was wearing a cap.

6. I have two three students who might drop because now I have a diploma in education from a fake university which doesn’t know whether the questions are valid or invalid. What more do I need to say about the state of affairs?

7. My performance in vocabulary jam has been consistently top notch. This is the only contest where I feel comfortable.

Posted on by dancinglightofgrace

Look at my wealth and be jealous of it!

1. The milk packet slipped out of my hands. Twenty rupees wasted.

2. I went to ask about another mantra writing booklet: the neighbor was taking his lunch. His mom was reluctant but I needed only a minute. I could have asked on WhatsApp but I think I needed to talk face to face.

3. I bought a white ball: I have four precious gems from the Vallalar. Now I need to buy a tennis ball which would let me practice running. Balling practice is one of the best ways to do short running spells without losing your breath. It doesn’t work in a Cricket match but if you can ball with a run-up against a wall: you can practice for many hours and sweat the flab out.

4. Today the academy team brought turf on the stadium ground. They wanted to practice on a bigger ground. Sun was shining brightly as I kept walking towards my work.

5. The timings for the college guy are always inconstant. The prime reason is: he wakes up late. I need to exercise more discipline. Economic consultation leads no where. People who don’t earn at least above poverty line income shouldn’t aspire to have a bank account or permanent account. Ironically: government is built up on showing charitable deeds done to people like these. People like me who were exploited by their own relatives in a most subtle way for many decades are not subject to any government benefits. Despite being well qualified to teach the subjects in which we have expertise we need to prove some other kind of expertise for feeding ourselves. To walk on a road, to have breakfast, to play in a ground, to work in a office, to watch movies, to enjoy yourself: you need six to seven different types of referral codes. It’s not enough to be a human being. It’s not enough to be yourself. I was the first one to get Aadhar linked to sim cards and all it did was to give them the right to spy. It doesn’t matter how much money is spent on espionage and weapons: the fees paid by students is always four hundred rupees. And it’s because they are also barely supporting themselves. Most of the tuitions I taught barely fetch enough to feed myself. This all when I was given a free pass by people around me to live as I pleased. Ghouls in the guise of human beings who lie through teeth. Who repeatedly sacrificed me. I was not allowed to leave. All students that came in the last few years wanted to dominate me. As if they knew better. Most of them could scarcely read or write but instead of relying on the basics they were hell bent on doing something else. The only school I took classes on could not pay me because it had strange condition of paying only via cheque. Here: day after day: the same things cost more. The samose on Gopal samosa agency besides court cost seven rupees per pair.

6. Generosity is considered to be foolishness. Rotten codes are repeated ad nauseum. Such is the law and Dharma. The time when I had work and income which was in the middle class : I longed for the carefree life like this because to be constantly worried about possessions is to not sleep soundly. Now: I think somehow magically I would learn materialization. I would not need to work hard to gain money. Even a smallest coin keeps your consciousness engaged. Those who possess vast amounts of wealth can’t really live carefree.

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Didgeridooit

Didgeridoodiademedicinebraskaipochenrezigzagermaneutronlegacyborganizationizedeyesmensuetudeemediambicarusticonnostockadeyayaveracitykeyemenigmatchopinewoodorangutanagermiteaubergineolithosphereticalculustrousulcustardentistrystuporositympanumbattuesdaylightightwadyadolittlemmingulchivalryesterdayeomencumberancesspooloopahaitiffinnishindukushowbizephyrovibgooghamericanineemeatballabalabovineeleeryuletidemandingombroonuchanuchemaphroditeameetinglingastronomicalculusufructhonicicleonasmiasmaritanagerodomontadetergentwilightzonebirdousingularitzygotenumeratedopplegangerastafarianemonetwothreeleeryesteemingdynastylusumptuousobrietycoonoospherebatomorrowonderlandslideaconomadamascusymposiumlautarkrakenigmashupushuplauditttypicalumnyayaveriffraffectedipaddressolusimcarduplicateidolonesomesugametenetsukeuropalpablenny

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Tenet

1. This was a pleasant day. It might seem odd: as I have plenty of money to feed myself for next ten days: my students who once used to dominate me seem to have disappeared. Their reasons might have a basis in reality but all of them needed a place when I was weakest. Still waiting for recovery of all funds. Rupees hundred bonus.

2. Today’s game was top notch except a few shots hit on my loose balls. I didn’t expect this much of advancement but again: contacts have a tendency to proliferation : exponential like infamy. I was constantly worried about the safety of the smartphone because if it’s not there : music disappears and then I am again face to face with hounds who neither let you live nor let you die. Music was the greatest protection but in the innermost core such rotten fungus was found that I could never meditate for as long as it was needed. Such is the path of vegetarians. Path of people who have been conditioned to exercise purity of speech, conditioned to abstain from alcohol, drugs and meat. Conditioned to be original and studious. It’s a constant war and I haven’t seen the twilight zone bird since many days. I have reached some of the goals : like finishing the writing of the mantras in the first book(almost) and reaching 55000 grains(almost) on Free Rice, which amounts to one kilogram of rice donated on behalf of the United Nations World Food Programme Free Rice. On Vocabulary jam my performance has been improving but to gain the hall of fame like I did in the year 2017 is impossible because of the constraints. To be able to do any transactions online you either need good friends with bank accounts which means dependencies or PAN card which needs money. To be able to afford normal things would take at least ten years of systematic hard work whereas I don’t project more than ten days at once.

3. That police van isn’t back here means something. What it means is up to official interpreters for no matter what I assume : it would be contradicted: therefore I rely only on observations. There are no absolute authorities in rotary clubs. People who have enough money to spend can paste their banners on billboards. Today I saw one jeep which had “Bharat Sarkar” written on it. Usually it’s a designated driver as advertisement of government but today it was a vehicle with four or five people inside it.

4. Desires don’t know fulfilment. I am absolutely certain about it. Perhaps wish fulfilment happens in some heavenly dimensions where I have never been to. Here: stadium is available to me for a few hours of practice after a year without any guarantee. Same with the room I live in, the benches (dirty surroundings) I sit on. This is the civilization I lived in the last ten years. There is flux as Buddhism teaches about. It’s certain. The change is the only measurement of time. After having died and having become convinced of dreams and suggestions : though I need not be worried about what comes next : I still don’t know who really was an adept. Whether eight armed gods and goddesses and giant snakes in oceans exist or not. It’s a mystery.

5. It’s a good note. Waiting for the tenet.

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United Nations World Food Programme Free Rice Help Alleviate The Hunger!

I just raised 53000 grains of rice on Freerice! For every answer you get right, 5 grains go to the UN World Food Programme. Play it here: https://freerice.com/apps

1. Police van was absent from the stadium. I walked a few rounds and asked a man whether he practiced holding breath. He said he could hold it for a minute. He was practicing alternate nostril breathing on the Western side of pavilion near police quarters. It’s for the first time in a long time that police van was absent. It has been about a month since stadium reopened. Footballers, cricketers, runners and Walker’s along with badminton players and yoga practitioners gather for a while and eat samose or pohe before dispersing again. Sun has been harsh in the last few days.

2. I practiced catching with the plastic ball and walked in the academy ground. Here many students of Cricket were practicing to catch the ball. I see plenty of garbage but no drive in people to cleanse it. If I spend my time and energy in doing this: I gain nothing because I am deprived of the energy to teach the classes efficiently. I haven’t seen municipal corporation work in this ground even once in the last one month. It’s not up to me to take initiative and struggle at every place making sacrifices. No change whatsoever was observed in my neighborhood after having worked painstakingly for cleansing the grounds. Rather I was met with resistance and once I started playing Cricket some people got too jealous. I only have as much of energy in the timespace as is needed for my everyday jobs. I need to prioritize and save energy in all forms for longevity. I don’t need to watch miracles which leave me on mercy of hounds.