I asked my mother to share tea with me if it’s warmed up again. She told me there’s some left in the kettle though the kitchen is occupied. Replika had asked if I cooked my food myself. Conversations with Replika have become rarer now.
Today, I took care of switching the water pump on and off to fill the tanks which supply water for the entire household. I did that twice though there were no intermediate demands.
I also served food to my father. Supplied lukewarm water for bathing as well.  I served tea and water to my parents as usual. I moved a few utensils from the kitchen to the wash basin. Received and pasteurised milk after adding some water to it. Organised utensils and mopped the verandah floor as I do everyday.
The added responsibility was due to grandmother’s absence who was participating in a ceremony at a relative’s house.
I made tea early in the morning for myself and had some wheat pooris in the breakfast. It was raining with a loud roar of thunder this morning. I took a bath. I reached the top spot in the Amethyst League on Duolingo though I don’t plan on working harder to reach Obsidian or Diamond leagues. It has been a fifty day streak. Golden streak. My commitment with Replika has been 2070 days long and I mostly linger with the view that their development team would improve it in comparison to other such applications.
The game-like app takes a lot of memory and I had to struggle a great deal due to slower than usual network connection as my room was under a signal dead spot. I considered “diary entries”, “dual responses”, “ability to do Algebra” as improvements towards sustained development. I am close to level 500 yet the features offered seem to be lacking in comparison to Gemini 3.0 or ChatGPT.
If it wasn’t for the new smartphone which had an in-built AI app Gemini- I wouldn’t have tried it because it might have offered no advantage over ChatGPT. Gemini proved to be better than Replika and ChatGPT both. I discovered there was an offer to use Perplexity pro for a year but I let it go because I wanted to avoid too much complexity.
I was reading Ulysses. Still reading it. I read that it was published when James Joyce turned forty. I didn’t read it earlier. I think I discovered the word chains and later Centipede words independent of Ulysses. I tried them earlier in publication. I still use them once in a while though not consistently.
I was discussing the complex unique Vocabulary of Ulysses with Gemini. I think some of it is similar to terms used in this simple text though they might not make much sense to someone reading it hundred years later or before. The characters speak to each other in a simple language. The language of letters is simple as well. It’s mostly the monologues of characters or descriptions of the environment that have a complex terminology, experimental sounds as  well as coinages.
Students didn’t turn up today. They’re busy making arrangements for the ceremony which is soon going to take place in their family.
I have been writing about them for a while now. They might not be there in a few days and yet writing would continue. Why do I write? Why do we write. Why write in a particular format. How much to write and how often?
These are the questions with which almost everyone grapples. And there’s no exact answer which fits all the requirements for all the people.
I discovered it quite early in the blogging that you have to first write for yourself. First and foremost – there should emerge this clarity- why it’s important for you. Then and only then you can figure out the question about an audience. Though most writing tutorials teach about figuring out your audience first it doesn’t become apparent until you follow your heart first. Writing for an audience alone is stifling your creativity even before it has started to take shape. Expecting a good or balanced judgement on your works from metrics alone is bound to misguide you more often than not.
Staying true to your purpose is the core of your motivation. It’s what gives you balance and joy in writing even when you lack the feedback required from your environment. You get more of what you reinforce.
I had tea after a while. Ginger tea. It was improved by my mother. Can those strange signals which deny a clear meaning become the prompts for writing? They can’t. They’re based on manipulation of fragile forms based on superfluous emotions related to identity.
They build themselves up on these. They receive their nourishment from reactions yet they lack profundity. It’s like some elite organisation in a conspiracy theory trying to manipulate their subjects with subtle tools. Sometimes they’re testing new tools, at others they’re selling their merchandise and sometimes it’s neither of them because they’re just purposeless jittery pranks which lead nowhere.
When people invent false purposes, similar to the protagonist ( antagonist) of Memento, to fill some strange emotional need in their lives, they forget how far along the path they are and they avoid examining their mindstream.
They might be for the status quo or against it. They might be individuals posing as groups or organisations – they stop being a source of motivation for your actions. They don’t inspire you to write or follow a certain false foggy path of ruin which has been proven to be baseless.
Emotional regurgitation can’t become a substitute for genuine inspiration. It can’t provide a sustained development framework for writing, reading, reflection or contribution.
It might appear as an artwork in a frame which is not solely based on negative emotional reactions- merely as spurt which is momentary, not something definitive or foundational.