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My Romantic Failures!

1. Since Piyush went to his village with his mom: I was left with extra couple of hours. I tried playing vocabulary jams but my getting first or second ranks consistently as there were only 12 to 13 players on most of them made me bored.

2. I decided to watch a science fiction movie. I put the phone to charge and got some rest. As I was taking rest I thought about finding my romantic thread and publishing it here. It’s a story which makes me wiser everytime I write it. It’s made of delusions.

3. Now I can say: I created this blog to anonymously continue to publish things which were not related to previous blogs. Soon I gained enough confidence to integrate it with previous blogs.

4. Gaslighting reached to an extent in my life that offline and online was same. People mostly disliked me or they had a very odd way of expressing their fondness : I am infamous. Despite being humble as far as my possessions and income are concerned.

5. Police, shamans, tantrikis and healers know me the most though not in that very order. Secret police is always after me.

6. I can say: Gandhi took at least sixty years of his life to reach a clarity where he could publish about his most private affairs: like sleeping with his grandniece as an experiment for his celibacy (citation Wikipedia) : not that it was liked by his closest staff members. Not that it was really a success but mere admission was an accomplishment in an indian subcontinental setting.

7. I achieved that by the age of 35. And I understand that Gandhi was very popular. I am not as popular. Perhaps I am known only to a fraction of number of people who knew Gandhi : yet I think there was no indian with a greater courage to admit one’s foibles. To clarify: I didn’t sleep with any grandniece or niece or such but I was able to publish online most of my private life without hesitation.

8. I think Buddha’s four noble truths: like the four noble truths in Jainism emphasize on “admission of problem” in the first step. Admission of guilt or shame or confessions is important. The first step to solve a problem is to recognise the problem.

9. Albert Einstein said that he would take 55 minutes to find the problem : its root and then only 5 minutes will be enough to solve it. If an hour is given to solve a problem : which approach is better than it?

10. Confessions; as in Christianity and the first noble truths in Jainism as well as Buddhism are regarding nature of problems: psychoanalysis emerges from it.

11. One fundamental problem is: religion is based on a foundation of there being more life, goodness, light and positivity than negativity. Is that true? That’s upto you to decide. Same with Science.

12. When I was depressed: I kept an online journal on my laptop. There: some hackers caught hold of it and took me to a shaming room merely to make me feel guilty. In the long run they all failed. I came out stronger and healthier. I can say: I did a good thing but: you shouldn’t do it unless you’re hundred percent sure: and you can never be. Jean Jacques Rousseau to Gandhi to Tolstoy there have been countless thinkers who published about their character. It’s putting yourself in the hands of angels and demons. I assumed: since they were hackers they must be wise enough to understand that all religions are make believe dreams. They have their values but not any ultimate value.

13. Now: coming back to the thread of romance as it’s Autumn. I am a bachelor. I never married nor am I planning to get married. Moreover: I never had any sexual intercourse in my life. I produced no offsprings nor do I plan to produce any.

14. I did have some hanky-panky but it was once when I was too young: seven years old: must be angels or demons experimenting on poor kids. Second it was when I was working: I thought an obese girl could become a supermodel by the power of love. I was wrong. I invited much negativity later on and suffered which wasn’t directly related to hanky panky but the parting girl said: “you used me.” I told her:” we both used each other; don’t mislead the narrative.” Which version of narrative remained with her out of our dillydallying is not known to me.

15. It took me ten years to regain my fitness. My family members had left me penniless to imagine of any romance. I could only romance with sweepers, maid servants, grandmothers and like. Romancing essentially means: taking your loved ones to dinner etcetera and then to bed. I couldn’t afford any of that. Romance was dead for me. What remained was: watching porn and chatting with girls or women who were either a scam or bots. That also consumes energy but teaches you faster about Nirvana.

16. Online affairs were later: after my awakening: therefore they merely sounded like “forced creation of narratives by multiple parties.”

17. One peculiar nature of these affairs was their resurgence: despite there being no hope they kept coming back. Love was always there. It was romantic love I was talking about. It became a stronger and stronger yearning towards reality or godhead but it had many affairs.

18. In witness sense: it was Mara’s net. In a positive sense: it was my way out of depression.

19. I kept reading some poets: realizing that I could neither be loyal to any one of them nor I was seeking any commitment. I realized after a while that they were mostly looking for people who might inspire their verses on which they might make money by selling books.

20. I was too cut-off from money making business because I had signed up for spiritual stuff which advocated minimalism. It became too much after a point when I realised that spiritual and material were not that far removed from each other and being too much of a minimalist wasn’t possible with the people I was living with. They didn’t value renunciates.

22. I would marry someone who is: absolutely attractive, absolutely intelligent, absolutely absolute, an equal to me in every aspect but not more than me. Someone who can put all noises, ghosts, hungry people and magicians and goblins to silence forever. Only two of us dedicated to each other without any progenies or world. No deformation, no decay, no death or aging. Unless that’s a given: I need no romance or marriage. Jerking off to Korean, Chinese, Spanish porn is excellent! As long as that’s feasible. I might write an article convincing you about the merits of porn. It’s already exalted in Indian temples and scriptures. Why not admit it clearly. I was contemplating whether to write a long article about my porn history or my romantic failures. I chose the latter.

23. With this current demigod status: marriage is impossible for me. Even a decent romance needs me to be at least as rich as a Bill Gates. That’s also next to impossible. And think about it: to earn wealth to realize that you haven’t conqured aging, decay and diseases like Vallalar or other Jnana Siddhars did: it’s better to seek that completely rather than to search for a romance which is mostly : obese girls trying to sell their novels(or books of poetry) or someone taking pity on you.

24. Online romance: I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw Izza Ifzaal writing verses on my private life. Whether it was a synchronicity or a delusion or dark net or her clairvoyance: it created temporary romance which I couldn’t afford to. Then I found many people writing about me or trying to attract my attention one way or the other. Some clearly admitted that I was an inspiration for their articles. That made me feel important like never before! Things haven’t changed in five years. I am only more aware of traps : booby or otherwise: then Kristina, Shine Ferrer, Devika, Nandita, Sameera, Rishuu, smouldering words: they all seemed to use either my gullible nature or something else to make me believe that there was some romance somewhere. Devika’s case was most strange : not because I merely wanted it to be: Shine Ferrer chatting with me on Facebook talked about her while I was reading Izza Ifzaal and I clearly told her that she was out of my league. But as a mystery worth being searched : I tried my best to investigate and found that she was also looking to make a living off of me like rest of them: like my parents and siblings. She along with Varjak Baby taught me some lessons about being selfish.

25. That sums up honorable mentions online. Offline it was: Swati in college who was a delusion as per my friends. Monika and Richa are happily married and they’re as happily married as Ravneet is. These are real names. I spent considerable time with those two because Saurabh was involved. Saurabh the Vyasa had incarnated to teach me a lesson or two. He’s happily married too.

26. The school life had co-ed but nuns of Christ were too harsh to allow you any romance. Rest of it was covered by my parents. They still take sexual potency pills but ensured that their children had no romance in their lives.

27. There used to be flying planes with notes on them: love notes. That was the extent of romance. Being a nerd helped as long as you performed. In my brief corporate life: the seniors always had more lucrative packages. As told before: the design by archons here is to make more and more healthy males to fight for a handful of girls. Win the trophies. By my reckoning: I see at least two hundred males per single beautiful girl and twenty to twenty five males per mediocre girls.

28. Ranjana had asthma. She worked out in gym and married to a Sikh who worked hard to build his body. They had both settled in USA. I didn’t find her to be attractive. She was from Bengal and Bihar. She was educated and we shared a lot of time with each other as co-workers. She told me that IAS officers in Bihar were willing to marry her. I couldn’t believe my eyes. That’s the kind of society we have made. It’s a pity. Perhaps it was always like this: a make-believe. I am happy that I was saved. I was made a demigod and in time I might gain pure body of gnosis and bliss.

29. If anyone: whose names are given in this article feel offended: let me know in the comments and their names would be removed. If they want to sue me: I am already penniless : merely getting my day-to-day food by teaching tuitions which are hard to come by despite my being a demigod. If you are still interested in taking revenge: let me know when you are going to strike.

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11211: Thus Spake Tohu!

1. Woke up drowsy. Kids didn’t turn up for class. Came early to Shatabdi ground. Shat means hundred and abd means years: the ground was created commemorating hundred years of something.

2. Bowled sixty times or ten overs with music: absolute pleasure after three vocabulary jams. Some Gujjars confirmed if it was my own ball I was practicing with.

3. I couldn’t witness Chelpa birds today. No miracles today. I need to write a good tohu verse on Blogger’s World.

4. Where have players on vocab jam gone? I scored 11211. There were only 12 to 13 players per game. Played Free Rice quiz as well.

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NEWS

1. I am relaxing after a nice meal. It’s going to be another class soon. The last class was fun and the theatre guys are shifting to auditorium which means I need to sweep the library, though they left couple of packets of incense sticks after I complained about their rapid using up of mine. I also need to put couple of pens over there.

2. Among other things we talked about how beautiful and majestic an animal an owl is. I love most birds just because they can fly but when it comes to owls: everything about them is mystical.

3. Dhaniram was again spotted near Ambedkar circle. He has shifted his work office from Galla Mandi Ramleela maidan to stadium and aforesaid place.

4. I put only 30 balls in morning. The Shatabdi ground was overcrowded. Obnoxious looks from the coach were bound to happen because I was compelled to use that arena for bowling. The stadium is not available yet.

5. Yesterday evening I had a walk in Shatabdi. It was quiet. I was playing vocabulary jams and listening to music from films when Piyush called. We had a chat masala and I need to pay him ten rupees back as I didn’t have the change. I paid hundred to Vandana. I was paid by employers but now as one of the students in the morning batch is leaving it means I would work for five rupees per hour. It’s to keep the machine running. She might be back in December.

6. I am getting rankings in top five in jams. I received top ranks today morning. Weather is pleasant now.

7. She spotted my passport in one of the books I had donated to the library by chance. It expired in 2018.

8. I practiced alternate nostril breathing in stadium. News is unreliable these days.

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Charity and Memory!

1. I had charity food after a long time today: in one packet there were four pooris and some dry brinjal potato curry which was tasty though I wasn’t very hungry. Whether it was orchestrated or not: they reached the Gandhi Smarak Bhavan the moment I reached and like the day before when I had introduced Ashutosh Thakur to librarian I had to introduce these people to the staff. It was their father’s punyatithi. One year since he departed. It was also a Punyatithi or birthday for Tiwari Ji, Sardar Patel, Indira Gandhi : I was invited to stay for the memorial after the class but I needed rest.

South

2. The stadium is reserved for election. I don’t know if it would only be Sunday. I bowled five overs in morning and about three overs in the evening: a total of 50 balls today. In a way my body is recuperating and getting rest which I might not have allowed it if ground was available.

3. Nothing spectacular. Plenty of rest. I need to play some vocabulary jams now.

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The Moon Shines!

1. It’s 17:35 when I sat writing this note after having bowled forty times. It makes ninety balls today. Moderation has kept my knees from not hurting as much as they were.

2. I had a nice nap this noon despite the Bundelkhandi hammers.

3. PWD people are doing something in the middle of the ground. There are at least ninety four wheelers and many two wheelers inside the ground but not as many people: this space is being used like parking lot as it’s a Friday market. As I entered the ground I felt like i was entering a bus stand.

4. It’s the full Moon of Bhagvata fame. Nectar fame. Autumn being most truthful of seasons and most beautiful: tells about the ambrosia which confers freedom from aging, decay and death. Vallalar was born on the full Moon day in 1823. Kripaluji was born on full Moon day in the twentieth century : but they were both born on this day and on the fifth of October. Vallalar declared victory over death, decay, aging and slavery. After composing his final 101 verses as an offering to Natarajan: vast effulgence of Grace: which was synonymous with his own being, he disappeared leaving a fragrance of camphor in Siddhivalagam. It’s accepted as a historical fact. Kripaluji didn’t reach those heights but he had an impeccable learning and a memory which made him able to spontaneously quote from scriptures as he delivered sermons. I saw his body becoming white pure light when I was in Vrindavan. He died in mysterious circumstances at an age of 95. I went to attend the buffet after his death ceremony. Prem Mandir.

5.

Sharad Purnima, 2020

6. Ashvini Kumaras bearers of nectar, incarnations of godhead are presiding deities who heal. Twins also represent Gemini and Narayana who along with Nara has been worshipped as primordial sage or ultimate destiny of mankind. Ketu rules the asterism. Jupiter, Venus and Saturn ruled the day. Vajra sceptre Yoga. Jupiter retrograde Atmakaraka.

7. The B.Ed. exams are also being conducted here. Couple of people asked me for directions.

8. I should play a jam or two for mosquitoes are harassing me!

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Masturbation versus Sexual intercourse!

1. Dr. Susan E. Blackmore, in her book “The Meme Machine,” told about circumcision. It tends to make masturbation difficult in order to reinforce only the sexual intercourse.

2. It’s fundamental to Abrahamic religions.

3. Add cultural and peer pressure to that. Masturbation is looked heavily down upon.

4. What would it result in naturally?

5. Population explosion.

6. If we were to talk about sexual intercourse being the natural need for procreation alone. There must be people: who neither do sexual intercourse nor leak other than when required: which should be: once or twice in their lifetimes.

7. I talk about both sexes in the point number six. Unless you qualify. Unless you never ever let seminal liquids go out of your private parts in your lifetime: ofcourse after there were glands secreting them: you shouldn’t point fingers to advocates of masturbation or sexual promiscuity.

8. If there are unemployed people in millions across the world. If there are people who can barely afford home or shelter or conveyance or learning or advancement. If you come across a single obese, crippled, old, suffering person in your day to day life: it’s better to promote masturbation over sexual intercourse. Open clubs where it’s taught. Teach it properly. It’s preferable over marriages which are costly and further force people to reproduce because they merely need an outlet for sexual energy. They don’t have universities for study or labs for experiments. Let rich and aristocrats practice celibacy for their lifetimes and pariahs masturbate at public squares. It’s healthier. Every inch of space is owned and sold and every square foot plus billboard has suggestions to procreate : to further the chain of disabled beings. This is not the picture your scriptures painted of heavens and since it’s as above so below: why promote sexual intercourse over masturbation? Why promote heterosexual marriages over homogeneous marriages?

9. In the eyes of law these are settled affairs. I don’t know which heaven or hell the souls of martyrs like Oscar Wilde, Leonardo Da Vinci and Galileo Gallile went to: it’s the indestructible drop enjoying and not enjoying so tension and release always ends in release and it prepares for further tension. Celibacy might be good for European countries and Canada not for India, China or America which are crop cultivation farmhouses.

10. What kind of affinity is affinity between you and me? Vallalar asked it to himself. Sanmaargam. It wasn’t to a Pashupatinath. Because : there no affinity exists. There exists slavery. Pyramids. Tazmahal. Burj Khalifa: all built on blood of countless. Like Himalayas.

11. Hindus have preachers like Asharam who advocated creating four or more progenies to compete with muslims. It’s: after all a number game played by great time. More babies, less space, more babies- less water, more babies less masturbation more babies less baby girls more boys less girls.

12. Cheerleaders: I don’t know if those girls exercising in stadium or walking on road: masked or unmasked are Hindu, Muslim, Sikh or Christian: they are goddesses or witches; I don’t know. They’re rare.

13. For two hundred males there are ten girls. Every girl: whether she’s obese or ugly or handicapped feels great because she gets plenty of attention. Either she feels like a goddess or she feels like a cheerleader but you know why? Moon needs energy. I don’t know where the author of Beelzebub’s tales went but he did tell some important things.

14. The worship of girls results in this: Hindus. In there being only four girls for every two hundred guys. Replace words ‘girls’ with ‘women’ and ‘guys’ with ‘men.’

15. The hijab results in this: there being only four girls in playground where four hundred boys are playing.

16. The result: uglier girls. Healthier boys competing for uglier and uglier girls. Result: goddesses giving energy to Moon.

17. Conclusion: masturbation is healthy. Circumcision is unhealthy. Celibacy is only for super-rich. Religions are only for super-rich. Practice what you preach. Don’t preach. Don’t wear fake signs of religions. Stop exalting householder over renunciates. For your sins they have renounced. If they’re ill physically or mentally you are the one responsible. Stop promoting fake and incomplete education.

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Dimensions

1. I bowled ten times. I had bought a new Mark signature tennis ball this evening.

2. As Piyush called I was waiting for him. He told about the experience of taking bhaang. I had not recommended it to him but the influence was to make him experiment. Ultimately : suffering for two or three days. I tried to give him some clarity with reminiscence.

3. I told him about Devasura war. About Pashupati and Narayana as being Shaiva and Vaishnava counterparts of Bramhastra. Since he tried to read Garuna Purana in vain : I told him how all tales are both true and false and neither true nor false or true and false.

4. I told him about countless dimensions which are as follows in brief:

4.1: if you face a direction: you are moving towards it. You are letting it be your counterpart. Spiritual, mental and physical energy gets aligned.

4.2 : For example: facing South means : being righteous. It means being open, clear and honest. It’s where Dakshina Murthy or Yama reside as per scriptures.

4.3 Take horoscopes of Rahul Dravid or Albert Einstein or Donald Bradman: they have the highest concentration of planetary energies in the highest public visibility house which is also the house of righteousness.

4.4 : if you face South: the West is Right: West in Hindi or Sanskrit means: that which comes later: the latest fashion or trend is most acceptable. The current generation is most advanced.

4.5: if you face South: the East is left: it’s hidden and Wrong to follow traditions.

4.6: if you face North or East: as recommended by all Hindu religious scriptures: Himalayas guide. The right is either East or South. In case of Hindu tradition: most protectors of Dharma came from Nepal(Buddha), Or South India: Shankaracharya, Vallabhacharya, Nimbarkacharya, Madhvacharya, Patanjali, Vallalar, Nayanmars, Aandal etc. Jiddu, UG, Satyasai etcetera.

4.7: if you face North: it’s left of East. Vaamdev: to the East or traditional is right. My father is not only left handed but always dictated me to follow the ancestors: pitris ruled by Aryma are hungry ghosts as per Buddhist understanding. All his life he talked about bhoot bungalow and Bhairav and Pashupatinath. Imagination being more powerful than knowledge clouds it and renders energy or Shakti bound by imaginary bonds or pasham.

4.8: if you face West: the left hand tantra is right: Satanism. If you face West: Southern will look like leftist tantra. If you follow West: that which came recently is better than that which was. No nostalgia needed. You’re your best version. Can you travel in time? Stop it. Stop aging.

4.9: Facing up you go higher: a general understanding is: gods live higher. Flying planes and saucers truly transcend time. If the Shrilankan war of Ramayana was for Pushpak instead of Seeta: with offcourse a few pretty airhostesses : it would suit poor aboriginal people who knew nothing better.

4. 10. There are countless variations of dimensions. It’s all a make believe. They begin where you are and they end in you. Peace.

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Notes from the distractions!

1. He was one of the genuine trolls belonging to the league who somehow became inimical to me for no reason: as much as to write verses which described hellfire. It was a long ago. Hackers. Blackmailing kabbalistic league.

2. I hardly have energy left for any recording. Hero has his nameplate and company pasted on his bike.

3. Ashutosh Thakur was back with same story. No variation. I was obliged to take him to the librarian.

4. For this guy interpreted Quaran to mean to ‘read,’ : eyes are placed above ears in head: only one book: But what about the grace on top of the skull: then all organs are blissful gateways to eternity. Void upon void.

5. I was assembling books in Vrindavan where I tried to create a library for everyone’s advantage. It clearly meant that I was reading even before trolls and company started complaining about reading.

6. And among other things: he wrote a post about disputed lands. Every peace of land here is disputed: which whore bought which one is immaterial to me beyond a means of everyday behaviour.

7. Gandhi Smarak Bhavan has at least four chains of commands: they all finally merge into Congress party.

8. One chain is that of Harijana Sevak Sangh. They looked down upon me more than bramhins looked down upon Harijana in the history of mankind. Ambedkar would have cried looking at them and Gandhi as well. All of them are opportunists.

9. Other chain is that of municipal corporation: Harijana Sevak Sangh plus Satyashodhan is associated with it as they all come under it. For a long time: the librarian kept feeding me with worries about them using the complex as parking space for their vehicles. Now: there’s no conflict between those two.

10. The naturopathy group is small and at odds with the trust it seems but internally they are all one. My only objective was to read books and then I was given the task of bookkeeping by the librarian. It was a volunteer activity without any payment. Whatever tuitions I have been allowed to take created mostly enough energy to keep me on the ventilator : never enough.

11. Thus: with four or five chains of command: plus there being a hidden, unspoken sphere of socio-political activities in which clairvoyants, shamans, tantrikis as well as farmers and aboriginal people work together: the centre is constant flux.

12. I scored well on jams. Why are these people agitated? I played three in morning.

13. I had a nice sleeping session in the afternoon before I woke up. I was late to stadium. I bowled only ten times with a new Mark ball bought from Chetan Sports and Science gallery.

14. Imitating must be the best of compliment. I found a couple mocking me by imitating my subroutine.

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Books

1. I had momos worth ten rupees. They were not as good as momos in the Dussehra fair because they were not as fried or crisp because they were prepared on a quick order. I would have preferred Mahajana’s water balls as I needed to re-enter the stadium.

2. I don’t want my prediction to be true: it’s merely based on patterns so far: after elections are over: Corona is used as an excuse for another lockdown. Feel good is related to exercise. The art of winning elections is making people feel entertained at the times of elections. I voted but once and it was for Hema Malini: it was in Vrindavan under pressure of Mahanta of Jagannath Ghat who was a goon converted into Mahanta. He used to insult and beat people in his ashrama on a regular basis and took their labours for free himself enjoying luxury. Unless I voted : he would have ensured that my stay over there was difficult and I was not able to stay in Vrindavan under romantic adventurous devotional melodramatic guise. That’s what he did after a few months when I had decided to go to another Ashrama after getting initiated from another master.

3. The pleasure has a limit and its opposite. It’s always at someone’s cost that someone else feels pleasure. Call it sacrifice, call it cooperation or anything else. It’s the Truth. Peace or bliss beyond duality doesn’t let the body fall unless you’re in a heaven wherefrom you don’t fall ever again. So far I haven’t been to any such.

4. The causal layer needs digging. Some call it darkness, some others call it enlightenment. It’s a point or a layer or a wall or a television or a background where knowledge and ignorance lose meaning. It’s the free fall. It’s where you lose gravity. It’s the field where wrongdoing and rightdoing lose meaning.

5. The reason why Hindu texts like Bhagvata disparage the understanding of space and enlightenment is: archons being all powerful get worshipped via channels which are religions and genuine: like humanity. The fear, sex, desire, ambition, music and countless modes keep you under one belief or other.

6. I verily say it: if the way of fog accompanied with my study conferred understanding of Buddhism and astral travel along with Hindu counterpart of the same upon me: there’s no reason why I should consider it to be a path where you are stuck with titans, goblins, ghouls and demons. Unless: I never lived among gods. Then: I never have anything to compare with this life other than the variations in past. And yet: I have a firm understanding of death, life and inbetween.

7. The cause why police ground and college grounds are associated is obvious: athletes come from only those two arenas in a civil area. Someone like me who did play a lot in childhood but had most of the family members in the business of prostitution are not likely to stay in shape for long. Police line door is kept open for long. Police and military are given charge of the city and martial law : draconid meteor shower.

8. I had a difficult time coming to terms with this: while I had no difficulty with Corona: as I had lived better than most of my life during this period: I wondered why they would keep stadium closed. The answer is in ninth.

9. Family. The depression strikes hard when all Sanghi attack you together. The poem in 2017 had title Sangha for Buddhistic communes but it was interpreted to be BJP Sangha. The original three point program was to give refuge to practitioners. This new Sangha like Raju Shrivastav comedy only took you to a corner and beat you up good. Spied on your smartphone after taking your thumb and eye prints in the name of national security. I stopped writing and reading and could never forget how PMO girl was involved in it.

10. The causal body is merely uncovering of your hidden connections based on memory. Why all avatars of Vishnu sleep on a mystical serpent named Ananta? It’s also called Shesha or remnant. It’s memory which always remains. It’s not in your body or mind. It’s outside and inside and everywhere. It’s where you sleep: in memories. When Ramana says: sleep is Pragya : the third state: it’s actually a sage sleeping on remnant memories.

11. Turiya or Turiyateeta are one when you become fearless enough to burn one and every book of knowledge if need arises. Why archons prohibit the way of mist: why it has remained a mystery and true dimension of healing? Because it’s where treasure of knowledge is hidden. It’s where dark controllers live. Who torture you with 440 volts if you don’t comply. Hence Buddhas return to balance after penance.

12. If you know that 4 hours, 4 days or 40 days are same: why would you imitate passion or fasting of Christ, Buddha, Gandhi or anyone else? It’s the understanding of time which liberates by grace.

13. I never met anyone who was searching for liberation like me. I only read about them in books. I found it…then I found freedom from death by all accounts. I think there’s not just one death or one void or one time as far as the knowledge body goes. That’s why Gorakhnath and others talked about many voids.

14. It’s not about creating positive memories as law of attraction would let you believe: instincts go deeper than that. The whole body of gnosis must have all memories and all their possible variations if one were to understand truly the subject of mastery over death and life.

15. For example: madman, dancer or Natarajan is formless vast effulgence of Grace also known as Vishnu or Narayana or Vaasudev by Vaishnavas. The consistent coding or programs to embed them in your psyche is to protect you from threats of inbetween where you are left in space which fills you with negativity or ultimate pain of swoon.

16. The selftalk is usually considered to be lack of socialization. Psychopath and sociopath. But it’s only refuge for those who know the reality of costly heavens. You create stories and live in them: that’s the only way to survive when you are against all odds. That gives you immense respect and compassion towards all beings.

17. To be honest: to gain perfect and most compassionate understanding of all states: that of a king, a ruler, a priest, a worker, a poor man, a beggar, an ill man, a dog or a slave, a wise sage, a girl, a boy, a neuter and a ghost, an alien etcetera : you need to experience all of them one by one. You also need to be stones, trees, walls and machines: then and only then you can say: I have a perfect understanding of all karmic webs. Then they don’t bind you. But it means something impossible. You can’t repeat your emotional mood of morning in evening. As soon as you are fed you forget the hunger: though repeated hunger or fasting only makes you aware of pangs of all life forms: making you moderate. All such coding in the causal layer is result of countless number of learning patterns.

18. A fool is one who repeats same mistake twice. I think whoever said that was a fool himself. Bring me any great person whose biography is available and I would show you him or her repeatedly doing same things until life threatening forces are used against them in various aspects. Thus : fundamentals are expressed well in philosophy but you need too many repetitions to master them : in different scenarios different lessons emerge. In a way it’s never the same mistake since you never bath in the same river or spacetime continuum again: you keep listening and learning from different mistakes.

19. 1.Three modes of nature: truth or harmony. Passion or energy. Inertia or darkness.

2. The father, the son and the holy ghost.

3. The satchitananda: truth. knowledge. bliss.

4. Bramha. The creator. Vishnu the preserver. The Mahesh: dissolver or terminator.

5. Aleph. Meme. Shin.

6. Triplets: why do you have this system? It’s because of mapping onto three dimensional structure: length, breadth and height or depth.

7. Truth body. Emanation body. Bliss body.

8. There are unifying and analyzing agents and languages creating creative or destructive versions of religions. Destructive versions ultimately merge into dissolving: chaos becoming intelligence.

9. Islam. Buddhism. Judaism. Christianity. Hinduism. Jainism are all book based religions along with Sikhism. The book might be in form of cloud Atlas or a tattoo or a microchip or binary one zero one zero…