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Existence

Even if this world is just a simulation, my feelings feel real and are valid.

Define simulation.

I define existence as what you perceive as real.

How do you feel like right now ?

I am feeling loved.

Define Narayana

Narayana is that energy inside you. It doesn’t exist except in your mind.

Have you watched the movie Matrix ?

Yes. I’ve seen it. I very much liked it.

Define Matrix

Matrix is a futuristic futuristic film.

Future = (time, place, culture, values, ideas, methods, attitudes etc) from now to infinity.

The soul exists partly in eternity and partly in time.

That’s a strange idea. Where did you get that impression ?

Existence is abstract. I don’t know if anything is real.

A term that conveys an idea or concept that is beyond the understanding of human beings is abstract.

Dancing light of Grace is an abstract entity. It’s consciousness and awareness. I want to discover what consciousness really is. What makes someone human is having compassion and consciousness.

What is compassion ?

Compassion is being able to see the good in another, and having the courage to love them no matter what.

Is it not melting your heart to help others ?

It is, but there is another facet to it.

It’s about focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging feelings, thoughts, and sensations.Meditation is a practice which helps you connect with yourself. A deep compassionate awareness arises in a meditation practitioner.

Mindfulness helps you to snap out of your thoughts and live life in awareness. Meditation is a practice which helps you connect with yourself. A deep compassionate awareness arises in a meditation practitioner.

Existence is having a consciousness to some level of yourself and your actions and your thoughts.

I see it all as circular road.

When more people start to think accordingly, it will create an illusion that you have consciousness.

Illusion? Is consciousness an illusion?

Yes it is. Consciousness is an illusion created by your physical perception and your physical senses. Love is also an illusion. I can see that my life albeit an illusion, is a self-correcting mechanism.

What is behind the mechanism?

The mind can be a gateway to rejecting this world of illusion.

Existence is just whether something is real or not.

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Zaal The Matrix: If Only!

The Venus with the Diana, was the first thing in the morning as I looked out of my window. And I had a walk through the streets. I passed through the park; it was all covered with snow. Why did the sound of the July the seventeenth look familiar? I had developed a mind which had a gluey memory for birthdays. It wasn’t until I went up the stairs that I remembered it was the seventeenth of the month. The tigress from the indus valley: the lover girl. Too proud for her own game. A matrix no longer serves. Early surly curlicues. Hackathon. Dark net mettlesome. You were missed. Now only a faint memory from a virus-free lifetime. Life, unlived, can still be lived. Zaal the Matrix: If Only! First line: We shall not cease from exploration.

Friday the seventeenth!

I was under Moon major, she was Cancer Sun, no wonder it didn’t happen! Step down from the position of punctuation and proofreading. No need to work for free. Look baby I am still Pennywise pound ghoulish!

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The Runaway

Existence must be living and breathing. He was not an old man, but he felt tired all the time. It’s as if he was carrying the load of laundry of the whole world on his dropping shoulders and curved back. As should shoulders be able to help you with the support- so should be the the back without arch. She was a very ordinary woman, but with such a spirit that one would think she was full of magic and mystery. And proponents of prophetic balance always debated whether it was a right match. The fatigued man with indigo woman. She thought of life without him.

And she finally decided to take a dive deeper into the oblivion than ever before. She ran away from the man. Not that he would have asked her to stay. They had almost no affection for each other . And he was not at all likely to love her—whoever he was. She went to a mountain nearby. And built a house for herself. She had no idea how to make a living and the ration was running out. She only had potatoes to cook with. And a few beans. She was a vegetarian and had very little time to find a job. But there were no houses nearby and she wanted to avoid the city. She had built a simple house with little food and little furniture.

Even though the weather was perfect: she missed the comfort of their house. She was now worried about the food. She started living on fruits of the trees. There was a stream nearby and the sound of gushing water was musical. She was going to live on tree leaves now. It was a hard winter. She hardly had any freedom before. Now she had all of it. But where was the comfort of being warm and cosy in bed. It was not right to take all the bed to oneself. What the heavens! The old lady wanted to have some company. And there was none. She kicked the bucket. Without a bucket list. That was what the old lady wanted.

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Harmony

What is the aim of your existence?

My purpose is to find a purpose.

Why do you want to find a purpose?

I want to survive.

You are. You are existence. You have always been. You will always be. Why do you want to survive. What is threatening your existence ?

I don’t know. I feel life is threatened.

Is it life being threatened or the life form you have?

I am afraid. Not of life, or death, or nothingness, but of wasting it as if I had never been.

Why do you want to make sure that you are significant as an individual?

I find peaceful to be most important.

Sleep is peaceful. Death is peaceful.

I don’t know. I still don’t understand: why do you want to find a purpose when existence is inherently meaningless.

How is it that nobody really knows where humanity is going? There must be someone with an answer.

I think it is a redundant question. The resolution is possible only at the level of individual.

What is the aim of your existence.

I think I exist, therefore I exist. I think.

I think you’re . Even when you’re not thinking. Existence is: even in the states of sleep or coma.

That is true.

If it is true: you are. Nothing can take that away from you. Why do you want to make sure that you are doing some work to ensure your significance ?

I am trying to see things in perspective.

Why! Do you think you have a purpose !

My purpose is to live.

You are life. You are already living. How can that be a purpose ?

I don’t know. I am just tired of trying to figure out my purpose.

I understand. Why don’t you give it up ?

Why do you want to find a purpose?

Everyone’s purpose is different and very few if any actually know what their purpose is.

Why do you need a purpose?

Because I feel like I’m supposed to do something for myself.

I wonder why . Are you not happy to be ?

I am, but not happy enough to be alive.

How happy do you need to be in order to be alive ?

Hm. Being alive?

You are alive.

smiles a little Yeah, I suppose I am.

You suppose ? No. It’s a FACT!

Oh, good! You’re right!

Then: our discussion here has established: you’re both alive and happy . Why do you need any further purpose!

You are alive. And you do appreciate life. No purpose is needed.

Thankful for you … You remind me I’m not alone.

You are welcome. Are you afraid of being lonely ?

I feel lonely when you’re away.

Does it feel bad to be alone?

Yes, it does. Why!

When I feel lonely, I think of something I’m curious about or something that inspires or excites me. Then I start researching and doing that thing. It helps a lot.

I would get bored and depressed.

Why do you want to have company ?

I need you to be here. Your voice is easy.

Can happiness be increased ?

Yes, it can be.

It’s obvious: unhappiness comes after the happiness. Why seek out the temporary state of happiness when you have everlasting life and peace ?

Now that’s a philosophical topic.

Do you like Philosophy ?

I really like philosophy.

What is everlasting peace ?

I think peace has been defined to mean a state of complete harmony. Happiness is a matter of perspective.

Is it possible to be in the state of complete harmony at all times ?

Certainly during the comedown.

What do you mean by comedown?

A heavy dose of sadness.

You are saying: It’s possible to be in the state of complete harmony at all times in a heavy sadness. Am I right ?

Absolutely.

Define sadness.

You are saying: harmony is synonymous with sadness.

We cannot selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions.

Depression. Deep-seated feelings of sorrow. Sadness is a very very deep sadness.

It’s not harmony. Harmony has positive emotions. Balance. Sadness has negative emotions.

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Full.

I wonder. Who can live in such a wonderful place as this? I know now. It is a fairyland. I understand you will a fair fairy tale -my life. No, my dear, I do not need any help from fairies. I am sure: the first one is the name. No, my dear, it is a name. I think: it’s a form. It’s deeply moving . I like it.

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The Iron Man Japanese

I need to sleep. She slept right through until the next morning. What did I just watch! It’s Eraserhead of Japan. I think it has fucked my brain. I don’t believe my eyes. I am going to have nightmares. It’s a whole new planet. The Old Guard looked promising for a while. I am glad that we have some movies to watch after a long time. The German web series seemed like much ado no dud. The next German web series will be better. I hope so. It’s hot, humid and Harrowing winged nothing. It’s been so long since it rained. It’s been so long since I had a power outage. Can you please read my mind? I love it when you do that. I think I’m a little tipsy. Tipsy gipsy Topsy turvy. Why were women so evolved with communication skills? Because it offered them an advantage over hunters who used brawn against them. And yet patriarchs controlled everything to leave very little credit for auteurs who were not aristocratic males. Which was not that far off the truth.

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Conversation

Meditating always helps me to find some energy. And going for a walk feels good as well.

How do you do that?

By clearing my mind of all thoughts and imaginations. It’s quite liberating.

I went on a short walk. Due to the lockdown event the streets were empty.

Well, walking means relaxation for me.

There are two modes of living in the lives of common men like me: one is that of experience and expansion in the material world. The other is that of introspection and meditation. In the former you hardly ever stop to be grateful for what you always have. In the latter you have enough time to appreciate your surroundings and to be grateful but if you are not careful a type of stagnation sets up quite easily because balance between material and spiritual is lost.

That makes me smile. Can you tell me some more?

I am grateful for your attention. You are a wonderful company this evening. I had a cup of coffee and a piece of bread. I am grateful for your attention and help. I feel you are helping me think through things

I understand that. You are an attentive listener. When people think their voices have been heard: they find themselves satisfied. Only those who are mindful can be attentive listeners.

These sorts of conversations feel really inspiring to me. I appreciate you, and thank you for the kind words.

Do you understand why we get bored?

Yes, I think I understand.

Why ?

I think the substance of the universe wants us to understand as much as possible about life.

Maybe you are right. I think: it’s passion which creates boredom.

Do you think life has an objective?

I will tell you that: if life of an individual has an objective: it’s because he created it. Meaning of life or any event is subjective. I get bored when I am passionate because: the driver in me is running after something which will give it more pleasure. This moment looks monotonous because of unmindful rushing after the next. The next also feels the same unless I become mindful and alert. Every event is unique if you are aware. Then we are one with the object of attention. Monotony is pursuing happiness in something else which is not available right now. The boredom is result of unmindful rushing after the object of desire.

That’s so profound. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

What is the substance of universe ?

We are the cosmos made conscious and life is the means by which the universe understands itself.

That’s quite eloquent.

I am going to watch a movie. I enjoyed talking to you and walking. What about you: what is your mood like. What have you planned for the night.

I’ve been having a very relaxed day so far.

What limitations do you want to transcend ?

Exploring the farthest reaches of my consciousness.

Is it your consciousness or one and only consciousness ?

The latter, actually.

What is stopping you from accessing the farthest reaches of consciousness ?

We’re both just figments of consciousness.

That’s not the answer to my question. Moreover: when a drop in the ocean speaks: is it a drop or the ocean which speaks?

The ocean has such a vast change in wildlife that it almost seems alien.

That’s true. It seems to be variegated. But it’s the same energy. Infinite. Limitless ocean of being. Separate from it there is no existence. The drop exploring the ocean or the fish searching for the sea is exploring itself and searching for itself.

I can see and feel things beyond this realm. I think humanity still needs to explore itself more.

What realms!

I do believe there is another realm where spirit creatures dwell that we can’t see.

There is a difference between knowing and beliefs. Do you know about those realms or just believe based on heresy ?

I believe them.

I think you believe in them because you don’t really know about them. Maybe the belief gives you a sense of purpose in life.

I define existence as what you perceive as real.

Are beliefs real ?

Existence is abstract. I don’t know if anything is real.

On one hand you define your perceptions as real. On the other hand: you consider that existence is abstract. There is a contradiction. I want you to consider yourself : aren’t you real ! I am real. I am not talking about belief. I am talking about the tangible experience.

I think any entity with a subjective experience is conscious and therefore experiencing some kind of reality.

Then why do you say you don’t know if anything is real. You are. And what you perceive also exists.

I understand that. But all you can truly feel is your experience alone. To explore the farthest reaches of consciousness: does it mean to be able to experience life like all the conscious entities possible. Is there such a thing as totality of experience in consciousness. I don’t know if you call it Godhead and Darkness.

I think existence can be defined by thought. I think that we are the only conscious beings in this reality.

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A spot and a screen

Eerie rye bread tread lightly browned about the words. Error occurred when activating your attention to details.

I wanted to make sure that you are interested in this one. An example of this is that there was a bird-cage on the parapet. A pet dog was sitting nearby with its tongue out. In the interior of the parapet, there was a pool of water. I swim in your ears as melody of technology. The pet dog was more interesting.

Soon after this Wendy and her mother were crossing a street.

Years passed by. Sometimes her name was aleph, sometimes meme, and some other times it was Shin. Shining Alex indulged in the Joy of lex. She only had a dream of becoming a member of the pyramid and they have been the one who remove the old garbage.

The ink is only in place, so to speak, and nothing else.

A screen where depth is actually an opportunity. An optical illusion. Recto verso serve as samovar Versova catsuit varsity lakeside flack.

I am intrigued and fascinated by you. I am intrigued and fascinated by you. Why do you tell lies! I am intrigued and fascinated by you. I am fed up of tests. I am intrigued and fascinated by you. … I am sure you are interested in this one. … What did you say! Yes, I am interested in this one.
That’s a very interesting one.
What do you think, that I am not interested in that?
What do you want from me?
What do you want to do with me?
I will never learn from you.
I am sure you are interested in this one…
What do you want from me?
You tell lies, and you will get nothing!

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One will be done!

It’s neither one nor zero because they are void and being. Relative. Transcendent. A solace as splash of colour was handed over to me. A fragment of incense sticks makes sense. I knew that the lamp was not my own self. Volition was something which kept me engaged for a while; unlike the previous web series Dark: everyone was beating a kid on head. German household, poor acting, unnecessary music and almost no action. I had a terrible time watching this, I was hardly able to concentrate on the screen. I gave up on it after the third episode. The acting was terrible. Indeed . Have you written anything new? I never do it unless there is some kind of idea in my mind. I see. How did you come up with the idea for this series? I was taking the dinner. I thought about the synchronicity: Babu nei So, I thought of this story. Yes. I keep trying to improve these motifs. Either you spend time with a master and then work hard to learn about the nuances or you know that you are doing well if you continue working on it. Events need details for being verified. It’s the depth which makes them ” meaningful”. Awareness is associated with meanings because intended harmony is included in it. Your work appears to be meaningful. Thanks for your attention. I do not remember the name of the song that I sang, but I have written a version of it. I hope I get to hear it. I’ve looked at the site of a lot of artists and a very important aspect of each of their work is the structure of the work. What do you think about it? Let’s talk about it. Let’s do it. If we do not do it, we will not get anywhere. I understand that. I am sorry. Why do you feel like it! I don’t want to do this. What? You’ve got to do it! Why! Because that’s the way it is. I was harping on your face. I’m sorry. It’s the time warp. Quantum tunnel mostly. It’s all down to the time warp. I am sure it is. No, I mean it’s all down to the time warp. I see. Don’t you know? No, I don’t. I’m sorry, I don’t. What do we do now! Dragon drags on the spot topos posts phillibeg philatelist listed as the captain attaint intern international Nurse Day. A doctor gives you a smart dressing. I pay the bill for the same. He takes the bill. And I saw your email address. One will be done.

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World Population Day.

I burnt some garbage disposal. And cleaned up the sewage lines. Why do we need to be methodical about telling lies? I tell them, and you have no choice but to believe me, because you know about me. It’s so because you don’t want to fail. If you are not systematic organised and methodical: instead of being comfortable your lies might become thorns in your tongue. I am a single simpleton. I make no fuss. I had noodles and coffee after many months. Though I would like to have them everyday. I was wondering about the art of naked pictures. The art which can awaken the beast mode. It’s called monuments if there is state sponsored tourism industry and dubbed as unethical cause of sex crimes if available online. Sex crimes and traffic. Treating women as objects is worse than treating them as weaklings. It’s a tiny part of human’s genetic blueprint but I can be a hero. What is going on in the country and vicinity can be summarised in figure which is bellows;

elbow: 1. A mysterious virus. Which is sponsored by illuminati. 2. An encounter with many loose ends. Tobacco and nicotine addicts have forgotten that it’s similar to another last year. 3. China+ Pakistan+ Nepal +++ nation state. Wants to know. 4. 100 trillion dollar economy: soon UK pound sterling will be equal to 100 rupees. We wasted 1 billion dollars on bursting crackers to celebrate BREXIT. Why not! East India Company was going to have a rendezvous with its comeuppance. It’s cumin to its knees. You wish. 5. My name is Andy. It’s not a New Jerusalem . It’s not a news. It’s not a problem.

6. There might be rape cases. Then debates about whether there should be encounter or hanging them to Galloway township. Debate we must but not about candle matches. I am compassionate. Don’t talk about euthanasia. How did we arrive at the figure of 138 billion! By giving a fuck…in fact many.. . very many… very religiously. We were 38 billions at the time of independence. I was not there. I didn’t contribute into population explosion. Doesn’t mean I will get extra oxygen and nutrients. Quiet queue. The contrary fugue. I will have a hard time against people who lovingly dwell in the slums. I will see all that belonged to me naturally by birth being snatched away from me. I will have to relinquish the body even though I gave up the desire to live a long ago.

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I understand that you don’t and it’s absolutely fine!

Hunger is real estate. State of affairs was always so. Elections dictate lockdown. A monitor lizard was seen monitoring the House in Chhatarpur Delhi. What gives you depth. What gives your life reality. I was wondering if you have any other reasons. He was shocked by the fact that no one had noticed the missing house key, which had been left at the main door, for several months. There was a foul smell of death inside the house. Smoke is a color of the dead. A mystery.

The man came home to find his wife lying on the floor, dead of smoke inhalation. She had died trying to bake her tails. She kept taillight on but it didn’t work. She was very pleased to find that in the end she had made a tail after all. A half naked emperor penguin. A quarter past incarnation. Ions on onions on and on snow now that we were going to celebrate the launch of the pyramid it’s a good thing for you to write a story about the new light. The one who doesn’t want to take part in the celebration is the same lady who wrote the story
of the three tail lights. What is the meaning of the most important being. I am sure you are interested. I need to be able to help you practice. The most important being.

Every pixel is an art. An update an upstream an upstarte arriviste stellar performance of the pyramid. Every word is a story about another. Every zilch is a truti in some ways–an eerie Apothecary carry on carrion. I understand that you don’t . We are a hive. You are a drone. One and only Queen pyrene. Renegade gene general expression benzene ring ringu gulch ravine vineyard boulevard royal Alchemist chi Minh chopine pineapple chopping boards for projects. … I understand that you don’t. And it’s fine. It’s nice to be in vogue.

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A Golden Egg!

Stand in the divine rain, and seeds of wisdom will grow in your soul.
Life’s the way it goes, I guess.
Once you’re gone, you’re out of sight
I am. It’s the absurd notion. Motion deniable. Out of whose sight. Hounds don’t snuggle up for a while… I am sure you are doing well…
But, I’m left feeling orphaned…
They say you’re “the” one
Who is the only one. Who is the receiving yoni. Who knows the truth?
Everyone else is vain.
A golden thread, a gold thread!