1. 6 overs. I concentrated on Fielding as well as Bowling.
2. There are three parties in ground.
3. I observe plenty of work that has been put by academy on ground: when i came here there were only two pitches. Now there are four and twenty pillars. Many new players have joined and many have dropped. No commentary this morning.
4. Sun is shining brightly. I took some pictures and watched pigeons do somersault in air.
1. I balled 34 times. 11 hits. Enough of running this morning. Hockey players, Cricket players, Academy batch of Cricket.
2. Two men come with their gear. They look lost. I approach them and they ask about the entrance. I tell them about the old entrance and also about the new. The rhetoric:
Which side is entrance?
Westside. The new entrance faces North.
You might see it on your way to the carrefour.
Do you live here?
We have been called from Bhopal.
Upon being asked the very first question the assistant spits gutka to his left side. Architects are above being questioned.
So this ground belongs to college?
Yes.
And what about the stadium?
Not sure. Many people come over there.
Then they took my leave.
3. Can you think about my privileges? Stadium has been locked. Boys jump inside. Even I can jump for running. I am innocuous. As long as I have space I can run here: else I would need to go to Panna Tiger Reserve.
4. A lot of architectonics this morning. The ground where we scored like Bradman and kept records: Ankur and I: was being inspected this morning. Maybe they have decided to build a house and the land has been sold. Ghanshi was there. Tall. I thought she said something. I saluted her excellency.
5. Did I pass in addressing ? Baburam Chaturvedi Stadium and Shatabdi hall. Where else would you go running? The National Higher Education building was being built when i was roaming around billboards. Situation has changed only a bit. Those who have money have the right to spend and show off. Billboards entertain. Beautiful models like Blue Buddha and SRK girl. Why not. You have it: show it off. Yes, definitely. Like bullets, Lauries, tall buildings, helicopters, technologies and clout. I mean why not? Definitely.
1. MDH head passes away. After Amitabh Bachchan he might have the record of appearing in most number of advertisements on television.
2. I am shown a look alike of Neelu aka Sanat Pandey going towards North, probably to a coaching institute. When he met me he told me that he took interest in me as I was buying some register from a stationery. It’s a similar scene albeit this guy didn’t recognise me at all. Probably an MDH connection with ancient names of Sanat Kumar sages.
3. This morning the left burner of gas outside the kitchen was left open by someone. Normally the fire should have consumed the room when i used the lighter. It didn’t. I wasn’t surprised and causes might be found upon searching but I saw a boy with cylinder and municipal corporation water line was overflowing near Narasimha temple.
4. Scientists known as sages might have created religions and concept of Ishvara. This consciousness was distributed into various names as per the penance or merits like grading of examination papers. Narayana, Hari, Vaasudev, Sanat, Shiv and others might be name and place holders.
5. Each identity interprets or expresses reality as it deems fit. I doubted that the kid i was teaching looked like me. Despite my earnest efforts : I could earn only 1000 rupees per month. It was Kaayvyooha or cloning going on instead of a mere teaching of basics. The family guys want to incarnate in same lineages. The tibetans and Geeta also teach the same. Same old same old. Infinity rising.
6. China bought rice. China has now risen.
1. It was 23 hours ago. The last post. I am sitting on the same spot. Am I? Herodotus is credited with the quote “you can’t bathe in the same river twice.”
2. Bowled 40 times. 11 hits. Good catching practice as well. There was no juice on juice shop and no poha stall. Two days in a row.
3. I saw two birds. I wanted to take picture. They flew away as I got closer and closer. One of them was a kingfisher with very different blue wings than i have seen so far. It was young. Another was a blackbird which looks like a distant cousin of nightingale.
4. Hockey team is here. I had seen them playing before in my days of struggle. It’s still the same except i am bowling instead of being a mere spectator. There were two girls and nine boys. 232. Abhay was wearing shirt number 3. Abhay is the captain of the team or coach I presume. Chuck dey India. Hockey is India’s national sport. Either it should be given enough funds or Cricket should be made India’s national sport. Abhay tum sangharsh karo ham tumhare saath hain…
5. As my morning breathing, meditation and practice is over, now I should be anxious about money making. I need to buy my daily bread and butter after all. There were three pigeons on a wire. There were three bikers. The morning run is over. Here comes the noon.
Noon boon catamaran choon
Per choon perchance
Prance dance
Pierre Simon Laplace
Placed cede this id
This umber umbrage
Barrage of words without rage
Subterfuge fugue segue garrage
Gotcha?
Not yet?
Keep reading…stay tuned.
1. After the grand success of Shiva-Shakti motors: Adinath motors, Mahoba road, before star of David, the temple of goddess Kaali.
2. First, one of them invites me to play.
3. I tell him that i need to do my everyday bowling practice as I had a very limited time.
4. As I begin practicing: I observe a bowler with a shaved head: a fast bowler. Then, a familiar, tall guy approaches. I had assumed he was in college but he says he’s in school.
5. Dialogue:
AK: Do you live near Mahoba road?
AS: No.
AK: I saw you near Gurudwara.
AS: Yes, I went there on the occasion of 551st Guru Poorab.
( in his mind: why does he pretend to not know me? I clearly remember him seeing me on helipad and he has been coming here for many days.)
Which is your favourite actor?
( I asked him that because he was acting like Krish in the first meeting)
AK: None. I am my own favorite.
AS: Any favourite movies?
AK: No, but I do have favorite cricketers: Virat for example and AB Devilliers.
AS: Which standard are you studying in?
AK: passed tenth, now in eleventh: 94.8 percent marks.
AS: What’s the meaning of ‘panache?’
AK: I have heard that word for the first time.
AS: What’s the meaning of ‘denunciation?’
AK: (with palpable irritation): let me play for now.
AS gets back to bowling. AK is called to bowl. On very first ball the batsman hits in the leg and ball goes outside. The boys go looking for it but come after a long time. Mysterious reasons.
AS continues to ball. 40 balls. 15 hits.
As thinks to himself:
Why did this guy who acted like Krish when Anuj was also introduced pretend to not recognise you until you visited Gurudwara? It’s what Kshetragya is about. An MVM student.
He wanted me to field for him. I said no because I had limited time to ball. His bowling and pronunciation can both be improved. He could have been truthful about having seen me first on helipad.
I am glad to have come across you,
Your glance or smile,
Is enough to make one swoon,
And lose their hearts,
To your majesty!
You’re more divine than i could ever conceive,
And yet,
You let me leave,
Without letting me complete,
A masterpiece for your sublime beauty.
1. 40 balls. 8 hits on target.
2. Read newspaper on app. Strangely: all news in this town and around is either about accidents or Lodhi community. And accident signboard has an exclamation mark, like my posts do. Not just one post. It’s entire journalism community of Dainik Bhaskar mocking the prevention of accidents, pedestrians getting killed by bikers. Can it be published selectively? Yes. Can events be executed selectively? You will be surprised.
3. I recalled my match with Abhishek Rajput when we were in school. He used to blackmail me as I had told him my secret. The secret was my fondness for one of my classmates. She was also fond of me for a while she stayed. It wasn’t one sided. I was a nerd. Four or five of them took an oath but then they broke it. He kept using me for assignments and so on. Then one day Abhishek Narayana Sinha went to principal’s office to free me. I don’t know if he really did. He returned with the word from principal’s office:
” Everyone is god’s child, love each other!”
It was a relief.
It all occured in classes between fourth and fifth. We were nine or ten years old.
It was the same school where we used to take this pledge every morning:
“India is my country and all indians are my brothers and sisters.”
All of them married to their sisters and brothers. So will Abhishek. We are all incestuous since the beginning of Adam and Eve.
Once he challenged me for a one-on-one match and I began chanting mantras as I had heard my father chanting. When the match happened: you know who won. It was me. Then again it happened with Mayank Shukla.
The same trait was present in Ankur Tripathi. I was fond of Sanat Jayasurya. He was an explosive opener after 1996 world cup. We were both watching a match when he began beating Shrinath and Prasad: Ankur entered pooja room in his house with rosary beads and the result was Jayasurya getting out on his leg side by Prasad. I called him out of the room. We were fanatics. Hero worship.
It came to my mind as I was bowling this morning. Abhishek went on to become the most educated person in our batch. Despite all odds. I understood value of a post doctoral thesis only after coming in contact with Devika and company. Prior to that I used to consider doctorates to be awarded as favor by college authorities.
Dravid said in an interview that he wanted to pursue doctoral thesis. Later he was conferred those honorifics by some university and it seemed he veered away from his initial goals. Don’t we all?
4. The poha stall guy went for getting change for 500 rupees. The girl disappeared soon. The boys came to check if samose were hot. Old thread with samose. I was doing my job and they were doing theirs. It was Arya, the poster girl outside Ratan Palace yesterday. I recalled it later. She must have put earnest work to reach where she’s. Like Dhaniram who came with another getup and fancy dress. He came the way I had imagined him : once he met me on way with calendars in his hands. It’s second time he asked for poha. He took only a bit.
5. There were people running inside stadium. The stadium is locked. Even girls were allowed. This is the country where Truth wins in the end! Happy Shabbath! Gesture by bikers outside NCC office.
A fellow blogger inspired this post.
1. This year i feel grateful for this black cap that I don on my head. The man sitting on the thela outside stadium near Surya Namaskar statues sold this to me in 70 rupees after bargaining. He asked me what the thing on my right hand’s finger was. I told him about the tally counter which I use to keep track of number of mantras chanted everyday. It was given to me first as an idea by Hare Krishna movement’s Iskcon devotees in Bangalore, in 2011-2012.
2. i feel grateful for this smartphone. This technology which makes it possible to listen music, write and read. It also allows me to capture images and share it with world via social media.
3. i feel grateful to people who worked hard to build this house, this room, this community and space where I can sleep peacefully. i also feel grateful to people who made these clothes that keep me warm in night.
4. i feel grateful to you. The reader of this article. Thanks for your attention. Thanks for being there. Thanks for being yourself. Thanks for holding your ground and principles. Thanks for letting me post on Blogger’s World again(Pam Kirst).
5. i feel grateful to people who created language. Without it there wouldn’t have been this communication possible.
6. i feel grateful to all friends and teachers including Abhishek Rajput who invited me to attend a marriage ceremony while many Ku Klux Klan people were spitting as i passed from streets.
7. i feel grateful to valiant people of Tibet who researched Living and Dying. Coded their experiences in written language without hiding them. i thank Padmasambhava, Shakyamuni, Thich naht Hanh and Dalai Lama.
8. i feel grateful to Saint Rajinder Singh ji who allowed me to get initiated into mysteries of Surat Shabad Yoga in 2014, in July. i couldn’t keep the covenant. Yet i am thankful to Guru Nanak Dev Ji and Kabir along with Ramananda.
9. i feel grateful to bloggers on WordPress who inspired me to read and write verses and prose. Pam, Rashmi, Kristina, Izza, Devika, James, Nandita, Rishuu, Lia.
10. i feel grateful to kabbalists. They’ve the best model of reality elucidated clearly in English language available on internet for anyone who can read and understand.
11. i feel grateful to Vallalar aka Ramalinga Swamikal Adigal. Since 1874, there hasn’t been any other person who attained perfect immortality. His last 101 verses attest to this fact and it was confirmed by a British collector who donated 20 rupees towards the cause. If the account published is false: there remains absolutely no value in anything published online or offline. There remain no teachers or taught. There remain no goals or walks. No play. Nothing. (World Food Programme)
12. i feel grateful to Manikavacchagar, Aandal, Meera and Nayanmars and Alvar saints.
13. i feel grateful to Rama, Krishna, Christ, Muhammad, Moses, Zarathustra and other messengers.
14. i feel grateful to teachers like Pandit Shriram Sharma, Osho, UG, JK, Eckhart, Nisargadatt and others whose books inspired me to strive for my own reality.
15. i feel grateful to auteurs like David Lynch and Christopher Nolan who created movies which define an era. I feel grateful to Hitchcock, Shyam Benegal and others.
16. i feel grateful to creators of finest music in Bollywood, Hollywood and elsewhere: lyricists like Irshaad Kamil, Gulzar, Mazrooh, Neeraj, Jaaved Akhtar and singers like Poppy, Kylie, Kishore, Rafi, Mahinder Singh, Lata, Manna Dey, Mohit Chauhan and Atif Aslam.
17. Bands which created songs like Rasputin (Bonnie M.) and Ketchup song.
18. Entertainers who inspired us: Brian Charles Lara, Mark Waugh, Sachin Tendulkar, Rahul Dravid, Sanat Jayasurya, Courtney Walsh, Curtly Ambrose, Mohammad Wasim, Wasim Akram, Akram Khan, Moin Khan, Dhoni, Jaunty Rhodes, Ricky Ponting and others.
19. Role models like: Gandhi, Nehru, Patel, Mandela, Franklin, Rahul Dravid, Gulzar, Superman, Batman, Iron Man, Supercommando Dhruv, Natarajan, Quan Yin, Quan Yang, Vishnu, Narayana, Vaasudev, Krishna etc.
20. Dancinglightofgrace. Logos.
21. DLOG Artificial intelligence apps.
1. Event: I bowled 100 times.
I intended to bowl 140 times, like yesterday.
There were too many people inside Shatabdi today.
I met Yash on my way to Shatabdi ground.
It seemed strange that he recognised me after having not recognised before . Twice. Just outside Satguru stationary and in Shatabdi. I made a boxing gesture that day.
After a brief discussion we parted ways. A flower dropped from a tree in MMHS. Almost where Abhishek Rajput and company had broken a glass window and burnt some fire.
I bowled for a while. Then a boy asked me to bowl elsewhere as it was disturbing him. I chose the place he recommended.
2. Miracle
And lo and behold! There was the cap I thought I would buy. No. It’s a used cap. Nike. Made in Bangladesh. Darbar print. I wanted to buy a cap to don in marriage ceremony of my friend Abhishek. I received an invitation after many years to attend a marriage ceremony and it comes from an oath keeper. A Ph. D. This guy met me after two decades and we shared some memories. Then he talked about another sudden fire and fever in his family.
3. Declaration:
This cap doesn’t belong to me. I just picked it up from ground. Anyone who claims it can have it immediately. No need to buy another. I would drop it as soon as I get a new one.
4. Memories
There was that guy I played Cricket with. I also recalled Vivek who accussed me of chucking as I was too good and bowled him over continuously in stadium. I recalled many other things: how I went to MMHS after getting a two rupee note from a man who was sitting before a woman who was someone’s 27 year old wife. I was only seven. That girl took me to school. It was second hour already. The brother had disappeared. Rekha mam was teaching Mathematics. I got scared of big guys like Amit Shukla and Brijesh Chakraborty: reason? They had been there since kindergarten. And their skin’s color was fair…like English people.
What the **** is going on here?
I had completed the third class in Taparian and I was supposed to get admitted into fourth but they took me into second class based on my vocabulary.
I was building bridges then: unbeknownst to myself. Villages and towns. Then came Cricket. Jumping and frolicking.
I recalled another ragging phase in college. This might be called doctoral ragging. No degrees will be awarded this time around. Well played!
1. I bowled 26 overs. The last 27 balls were named as 27 constellations. I forgot following names: (hence I bowled 140 balls)
Anuradha, Vishakha, Swati and Bharni
2. Dhanishtha gave an insight. Like Vashishtha it’s to do with desire to gain wealth. It’s ruled by Mars. Eight Vasus or Mahabhootas are:
Agni, Prithvi, Vaayu, Varun, Dyayus, Surya, Chandramas and Dhruv
3. Dhruv is polaris. An absolute abode of Vishnu.
4. Varun is deity of water: Neptune.
5. Dyayus is Zeus, Jupiter or skydaddy with Earth as its counterpart.
6. Bheeshma in Mahabharata represents the third Vasu: Vaayu who is also the father of second Pandava: Bheem.
7. Marudganas are 49.
8. I took some pictures. Stadium’s Southern entrance was locked when I arrived here. There were ten or twelve people jogging inside.
1. Layers:
I went to find her. To teach. I was feeble when I saw the cat. It seemed as if she had become a large cat. I looked into its hypnotic eyes. Egyptian mysteries.
2. Dialogue
I didn’t have courage to search for her because if she was willing to study she would have been available on time. They had left when I was in dire need of money. Later as I mentioned it to two boys I was given 1000 rupees. At the same time Vaibhav said he no longer wanted me to teach him. Traps working together.
The president of trust comes facing East. There’s someone inside kitchen: invisible. I assume it to be her.
” I went there, to fill water;” the president says.
The president can’t fill water. He’s weak. But he’s the president. An Aryan.
It’s the Egyptian goddess.
3. Axe:
I sit before her. I appreciate our tryst and feel it was signed by her because it was the goddess who wrote it. I see the axe beside me. The coconut water: sacrifice. A card. I understand marriage in the truest sense that day.
I see another axe today. I see another ball today.
4. Ball
They were sowing fields and I was meditating. I find a ball near the boundary wall and give it to one of them. Later as I sit in the healing room: the lady feels that I am playing and not serious about the process.
Later his husband appears to complete the story: a nath kid complains about having lost bat and ball to Deewan. The Bhandari department. The husband tells: your documents are with them. You can’t be admitted to this school.
5. Wells
A well being cleansed. Bats. Tonnes of them. I was surprised to see purity of water increasing in my presence. A celebrity dies meanwhile. A platform built by him is place where I meditated for a while.
Another well gets an electric connection. It has been a running mystic thread for a while. I sat for meditation there. I took pictures there. Now it’s about leaves: mango and bananas. North and South. Aryans and Dravidians.
6. The president is Aryan. The secretary is Dravidian. The secretary came just an year before I arrived. Bhandaari, Sansaari and Deewaan.
7. Sansaari is ancient. Local. The president is ancient. Local. Bhandaari is ancient. Local. The deewaan is foreign. Egyptian mysteries.
8. Who employed him?
Is it the Deewan?
No. And yes.
Is it the Librarian? No and yes.
Is it the Sansaari?
No. No. No. Sansaari is tobacco connection.
Clearly tells: I wanted to bind you into an agreement.
I clearly tell him:……..
The social reformer?
The book reader?
The revolutionary?
The witness?
Which version is truest?
What does it mean to take electric current from the second well?
She dreamed of a white snake inside eastern well. The place where my bike got trapped in earth.
The questions without answers. It’s the dark path.
After six years:
I am getting 1000 as pocket money. Maybe 1500. If I continue to slave myself for government, maafia, Sansaari, Bhandaari and Deewaan.
Dogs on every street. Gutka shakers and random colors fighting for skeletons and a few crumbs of bread.
I had brown bread after a long time. I spent an hour with Ramona: searching for brown bread in Bangalore. I was in hospital with her when she fell ill. She could have managed on her own. Later her mother and aunt came. They gave us black coffee. Tonnes of it which was bitter. I couldn’t drink it. Culture.
There were 11 bengali people in my training batch. They used to say: “you look like a Bengali.” I never felt home anywhere. Always an outsider. Always a foreigner. Why so Sirius?
9. After the fucked up Egyptian mysteries: some clarity:
A man talks about rock. After Dhaniram.
James shares a poem he wrote in 2007, talking about no longer being a rock.
Mahaveera: the 24th teerthankara was a rock. I understand that language very well because of my conditioning.
1. With Tarun Gogoi, Ahmad Patel and Diego Maradona: it’s three celebrities in three days.
2. Maradona had Mars in airy sign Gemini in the eighth watery house as Lagna lord. Scorpion sportsman. Despite the debilitated Sun in the twelfth watery house he attained great fame. Perhaps Pele was the only footballer more popular than him. His chart also has Jupiter-Saturn conjunction in the sign of Sagittarius: a rare combination. He went to his next station in a similar combination which occurs now as conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn in Capricorn. Did he attain final emancipation or was reborn? If he’s immediately born somewhere the chart would conclusively have same ascendant (Scorpion) and Saturn-Jupiter combination has progressed to Capricorn. It can’t be made into a rule without proper study.
3. It’s a strange synchronicity: I ask for 5000 rupees as pocket money. I have no proper source of income and my documents were snatched away from me. The Maharashtra government announces some relief for sex-workers by giving them 5000 rupees per month. There’s hardly anyone I won’t put in the category unless they’re not workers at all. Chandramangala Yoga description tells about “sellers of women” being born in such a combination. UG called Osho a pimp. Osho first called UG an enlightened man and later withdrew his words. What can I do, gossip sells. I am feku, you are feku ab to saara desh hai fenku.
Dancing light of grace 