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Resonance and Sonorous Son!

1. I had a very subtle inkling of what was happening when I used to go to see ranking boards. It was a rare thing to get qualified for Resonance coaching institute in Kota, Rajasthan. The first systematic sacrifice, the first awakening, the first realization, the very first systematic invention of rhythmic breathing, reading Osho because the usual acharya wasn’t available. It looks like it was many centuries ago. The whole gamut included: Raj Bapna. Dr. Win Wenger. Richard Bandler. Uncle who sold his blood to complete his college (words borrowed from old sibling) . Bansal. The Great American dream. Astrologers in my neighborhood and family. Uncles who bet on me. Etcetera. One Usha Shukla’s husband had daring to think that my losing weight was result of being in a bad company. Another good jolt was given by one mister Khare who is still not worth being talked about. Another friend who was cunning, calculative and had his father in bank : he was a miser and kept his appetite in check so that later he might buy some toys for his kids to be and show them off on Facebook. I heard from him only once or twice until he had things to show off. The nightmare I had: the Vaitaal being played by Umang’s grandfather who had to become a great black hole later on. And my being unable to realize that my goblin father was eaten up way too earlier than I thought. I was an alien there and an alien here. An alien everywhere. Never enough smart, never enough wealthy, always in want. R3—R4—R5—R6—R7. What was happening? Bench to stool to tasting death. Why did that guy tell: ” I saw a dream that you died!” I later reflected on the event with the Hawaldar Murlidhar: I had indeed died. Perhaps he didn’t know it then. Maybe he did. It served as a great pointer to note that a new life began. I was creating rains without knowing it. And ironically: later I thought I needed to help people who had no rains or lack of them. How long it takes to grasp mystical from the viewpoint of human beings who reincarnate. It might be an hour or a minute for higher beings or nothing at all : from a standpoint where time doesn’t exist. Instead of reading “how to stop worrying and start living;” I should have been reading “The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying”: if its purest version existed which had no emblems from Robert Thurman. That would have been more useful than Osho : his half baked versions of Buddhism. That would have been better than Rao sir’s repeated exhortation about IQ. If I didn’t have the intelligence quotient to get coached: I shouldn’t have been admitted. But they had a big business to run which was started by Nehru and English people. I was not given admission into the fourth class in the school because I only knew twenty something words because that was the range of vocabulary my household or orphanage had: Foster kids home : where they are beaten and systematically raped for trinkets. Until they develop the Stockholm syndrome. They haven’t known any better. Resonance: means living together of people in harmony.

2. It’s a light show here. I bowled 101 times. A few guys joined to practice and field. It was fun though I wondered if I needed to move over to another place. It’s as much of running as I would have done after many months. Old hard work comes like gift or wisdom recollection to help me. It was something similar then: a few jokes by school mates who couldn’t really develop as good a bowling action or speed as I did. For many years. But I forgot everything else in pursuit of superiority. The reason: genuine venom in their jokes. That I didn’t have a round arm action; that I was a chucker: in turn I poured the same venom in my blog article ” a generation of chuckers”: standard actions and what is considered good is set by civilization and zeitgeist and we hurry up to follow through. Until we get tired and retire to see others do that.

3. Son means ‘sound’ as a root form. If extrapolation was right: all goldsmiths should have sound health. No male pattern baldness or aging. The essence is created by the word. The greatest son of father means there is only one son who is the holy Spirit or Logos. He’s the Archon or One of the seven archons. Yesterday I read about Saturn eating up all its male children and Jupiter being saved by Juno in the Greek myth. Add ouroboros or draconid axis to that: the serpent forms a circle and only those who move out of the circle are spared their life. I really don’t want any children to read this as it’s going to give them nightmares but perhaps Jai knows more than this already. My father’s aunt who was one of many tenants used to tell these stories. In some ways: she was more kind than the actual investors. Or it seems from a distance. Like those teachers who created some fond memories: some moments where I felt that I was special or deserving: not realizing the gravity of things to follow: perhaps nobody does that.

4. A written record by Vallalar in the year 2020 was better than a promise made by the teacher who initiated me in 2014. It might be that both were false promises : but the adept status was not claimed by anyone else in such a way after him. And if there is Truth in anything : his must be the final or best to be on the public record without having been suppressed. Lack of popularity can easily be understood by the argument given in favor of beings like Buddha and Gandhi: that they were emanation bodies of a Truth body which had already attained perfection in some other dimensions. Icons for “lokasangraha.” That stands true for all celebrities and if I see bazillion people ahead of me in queue to attain perfect liberation: the tall claims of Vallalar fall flat. It can’t be time or gaining merits via charity. It’s the conclusion I reached via gnosis in 2007. I found that making lists was like using needle in place of sword. It was a puzzle posed by the person who took me to get initiated by the Surati Sabd Yoga master. I couldn’t fathom the mandala scheme for many years until the parallel universes and time travel was understood clearly. I can say: I have a firm unshakable understanding of those two with actual memories of having travelled in time as well as memories being overwritten multiple times. But: I still don’t have a machine which would immediately take me to an old age or a future one. There are barriers which need immense reservoirs of energy to be done away with completely. There are factions: countless: trying to do the same thing. The great time still remains a challenge. Completely timeless beings haven’t met me as friends. People who have no pride for being immortal, young, immune to decay, aging or death(fear). I am waiting. To see beings with countless heads and hands. Giant snakes. Etcetera.

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To Call A Spade, A Spade!

1. I had a bath and a meal. I bought a red colored tennis ball worth fifty rupees ( ‘Bailey’ company )from Chetan Sports and Science gallery.

2. My student who couldn’t join me for the evening practice today had recommended to buy one costing twenty rupees but it was not available on that shop. I practiced with the synthetic ball for 40 iterations, then I decided to buy the tennis ball because otherwise the owner of the ball would have come collecting taxes. I counted sixty balls in total. Morning routine should have catching practice and evening routine should have bowling practice. As a general rule: if you don’t own a bat you shouldn’t aspire to bat. Most of the kids who join the academy pay thousand rupees entry fee, then they need to pay five hundred rupees per month, expenses for kit, bats and bowls are additional.

3. Needless to say: only elites play Cricket. Children of Mafia, Illuminati and land owners. If I am allowed anywhere near them it’s a privilege with much vigilance. The secret police is always inside stadium and around schools. The previous such unlock happened when it was assembly election. As soon as the election was over they again brought curfew like situation. This relaxation: freedom to roam around and play while I can only manage to drink half a kilogram of milk everyday for only next ten days with what I have: is because of the elections. People should feel that Madhya Pradesh government which came in power by buying candidates, and the greatest tyranny since Indira Gandhi as well as city goons are keeping well by only spitting once or twice gutka shakers unite.

4. Plastic got banned. Gutka got banned. Porn got banned. Ladies are safe until media pursues a suicide case. Pranav Pandya: the head of Gaytri Pariwar was facing charges of sexual assault and the case was on fast track. Now nobody knows what happened to the case. Now all of a sudden it’s a deluge of sexual assaults in news : as if all the rapists have been unleashed together.

5. To have yourself inspected : to be observed like I have been observed might have sounded like a real thing. All charges fall if I have a little of music. And it tells me how discordant and full of puss are those mouths : air coming out from which is no better than fart. Useless pathetic faces which have no other job but to encroach other’s property, violate their rights and to exercise unrighteous Dominion over others. People who use all devices merely to try mind control by depriving you of sleep, food and basic security. Such manipulation is from people who are already in hell of their collective making but think that they are in heavens. I kept wondering : the very people whom I try to educate and enlighten: the people very near to me who pretended to like me and even adore me were behaving like enemies : then it was all of them. I was absolutely infamous and for no reason but because I was being myself. I couldn’t have been anything else. This was my destination: to call a spade, a spade.

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Intifada

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Posted on by dancinglightofgrace

Loss all around! Be happy!

1. All three of the boys who came from the underprivileged community, paid meager sum for labors, dropped today with about five hundred rupees still to be paid to me.

2. I couldn’t teach them even three complete lessons of the English Grammar with Holy Faith International reference book. They can neither write Hindi nor English. Besides: they created multifarious conflicts. Firstly: the student who joined first couldn’t learn words. Couldn’t continue to write in his notebook, the words which I taught him. Secondly: he let reluctantly join a boy from his neighborhood after him and what followed was a series of Shamanism events. Then: once he said: ” why are you turning away from women, have you kept roza(fast?)”

3. In red shirts, two of them didn’t recognize me near New colony. Before that the first one had disappeared after the Lolo drama by Vikram and company.

4. Were they merely playing the role in coherence movie simulation. As I asked him about the event later: he didn’t recall wearing such a shirt. The first one was most proud. He showed it the most the day when he was putting the tyre on the burnt coconut outside the door and refused to take the class. The second one wanted to practice but was consumed by something else or I misread him. The third one was brought by him but disappeared without paying fees when I was being killed by multiple hounds inside and outside house. Their joining and leaving my classes is made so comfortable because I don’t go back to ask questions. Like that neighborhood uncle who was promising a thirty thousand rupees batch with half of that for me and its code had some 100 rupees note. Rubbish as usual. Suckers attended the classes two three days without paying zilch for it. Feeding myself needs my merits and money but taking my energy and life force needs nothing: just come and show some teeth or false promises or start beating an autorickshaw driver with a swafi or was it Swati?

5. I bowled 40 times. Equivalent to 1000 steps of run. I walked a few rounds. This is all I am left with for Chandla uncle came sniffing my back here. He was wearing a cap.

6. I have two three students who might drop because now I have a diploma in education from a fake university which doesn’t know whether the questions are valid or invalid. What more do I need to say about the state of affairs?

7. My performance in vocabulary jam has been consistently top notch. This is the only contest where I feel comfortable.

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Look at my wealth and be jealous of it!

1. The milk packet slipped out of my hands. Twenty rupees wasted.

2. I went to ask about another mantra writing booklet: the neighbor was taking his lunch. His mom was reluctant but I needed only a minute. I could have asked on WhatsApp but I think I needed to talk face to face.

3. I bought a white ball: I have four precious gems from the Vallalar. Now I need to buy a tennis ball which would let me practice running. Balling practice is one of the best ways to do short running spells without losing your breath. It doesn’t work in a Cricket match but if you can ball with a run-up against a wall: you can practice for many hours and sweat the flab out.

4. Today the academy team brought turf on the stadium ground. They wanted to practice on a bigger ground. Sun was shining brightly as I kept walking towards my work.

5. The timings for the college guy are always inconstant. The prime reason is: he wakes up late. I need to exercise more discipline. Economic consultation leads no where. People who don’t earn at least above poverty line income shouldn’t aspire to have a bank account or permanent account. Ironically: government is built up on showing charitable deeds done to people like these. People like me who were exploited by their own relatives in a most subtle way for many decades are not subject to any government benefits. Despite being well qualified to teach the subjects in which we have expertise we need to prove some other kind of expertise for feeding ourselves. To walk on a road, to have breakfast, to play in a ground, to work in a office, to watch movies, to enjoy yourself: you need six to seven different types of referral codes. It’s not enough to be a human being. It’s not enough to be yourself. I was the first one to get Aadhar linked to sim cards and all it did was to give them the right to spy. It doesn’t matter how much money is spent on espionage and weapons: the fees paid by students is always four hundred rupees. And it’s because they are also barely supporting themselves. Most of the tuitions I taught barely fetch enough to feed myself. This all when I was given a free pass by people around me to live as I pleased. Ghouls in the guise of human beings who lie through teeth. Who repeatedly sacrificed me. I was not allowed to leave. All students that came in the last few years wanted to dominate me. As if they knew better. Most of them could scarcely read or write but instead of relying on the basics they were hell bent on doing something else. The only school I took classes on could not pay me because it had strange condition of paying only via cheque. Here: day after day: the same things cost more. The samose on Gopal samosa agency besides court cost seven rupees per pair.

6. Generosity is considered to be foolishness. Rotten codes are repeated ad nauseum. Such is the law and Dharma. The time when I had work and income which was in the middle class : I longed for the carefree life like this because to be constantly worried about possessions is to not sleep soundly. Now: I think somehow magically I would learn materialization. I would not need to work hard to gain money. Even a smallest coin keeps your consciousness engaged. Those who possess vast amounts of wealth can’t really live carefree.

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A Decent Meal Needs A Huge Vocabulary!

1. I had a decent meal. I needed to wash clothes and utensils but I feel like not doing it because, first: I don’t have detergent. Second: to cleanse utensils means subjecting myself to voices which I might not like after having achieved this rare mind isolation. All miracles happen when you’re hungry, thirsty, scared and susceptible.

2. The peace. I called her to open the door. I had a nice time in evening at stadium. I played vocabulary jam on vocabulary.com and free rice quiz. I walked and ran a bit. Though sometimes it seems cumbersome to carry all this gear to the playground: I do remind myself that I have walked gearless, sat naked, walked naked and fearless and laughed at myself, zucchini, at the world at large. I have not known any mind isolation spoken of in Buddhist scriptures except through using earphones to suppress surrounding sounds. If listening to the inner sounds does result in achievements: I still fall short of achieving a sound proof hall of gnosis where I may sit indefinitely without life force getting sucked out of this body. A place where I am not purturbed by any sounds for as long as I want to. A place where I need not pay anything to stay comfortably for eons and eons. Since I am demanding it from the logos: it’s not from Jeevanmukta status. It’s from the adept status who has seen time loops and transcendence. Who has witnessed dance of death. I am demanding it because it has neither been fulfilled nor is it going to get fulfilled, rendering null all the tall claims made by all who came in that tradition. Since I have seen time and great time: the argument that it will take time is invalid.

3. Surangama sutra is invalid.

4. Yadgatva na nivartante tad dhaam parmam mam is invalid because the great time overpowers the Vaasudev in every scheme.

5. Liberation and bondage are both imaginary yet I wait for a transcendence where I am completely free from their ideas.

6. Lucid dreaming with such a huge amount of structures and work is neither lucid nor dreaming.

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Ogham!

1. I played a five overs match on “Real Cricket.” There was a call from Sagar Aggrawal specifying why PAN card couldn’t be made despite three months of wait. I had one made in 2008 in Bhopal via agents. It was easier than as I had a sponsor and some prospects. This time around I applied for making reparations once I had some money to spare. Now I realize : it will be a long time before I have enough money to open a bank account to be able to do online transactions. Perhaps they are new to the business. I made eight visits to a private office where I had specified my requirements in the very first meeting:

2. I lost my PAN card six years ago when I had given it to my younger sibling because I was wearing a lungi. He said he had dropped it. Now I need new card. If someone uses it: penalty should be imposed on those. If ethical responsibility is to be called: it’s the sibling’s responsibility.

3. If I had a few thousands rupees : I would have got the application processed within a day or a week. Since I have had no income in the last eight years and barely supported my sustenance: there arises no question of filing for income tax returns.

4. Office office and Musaddi Laal. It was a private office and I thought they were swift in the service. They only kept changing the terms of assurance. Clearly because: I had no resources. This is what happens to common man. I am not saying that it would have been different if I would have gone to another agent. I will wait for more income and then try opening a bank account. Then PAN card and other cards. This is the best I have played Cricket.

5. They couldn’t produce what they said they would. They had lack of experience in this domain.

6. I had to write more in the notebook of my student. She can barely write or read English because she belongs to an underprivileged community. She has had no formal education in English subject in the last seven plus years of education. I wrote her introduction questions in cursive handwriting: the result: she asked me to write again in block letters. Foster kids pre school or play school. I asked those kids: if none of the kids had mothers and fathers? They had no clue about my talk.

7. On the days i feed myself well the demons start burning. As a rule: if you feel good, someone has to feel bad.

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United Nations World Food Programme Free Rice Help Alleviate The Hunger in the World!

I just raised 48000 grains of rice on Freerice! For every answer you get right, 5 grains go to the UN World Food Programme. Play it here: https://freerice.com/apps

1. I sweeped the room which was pending since long. I cleaned the handkerchief. I am practicing forced exhalation. At once I used to do it ten thousand times everyday. I need to get back into shape. The match I played today: I couldn’t score enough runs for my team.

2. Today, one of my students went to stadium with me. He can do six pull ups whereas I can only do about three. He still owes me twenty rupees which would be paid tomorrow when our books get clear and we begin a fresh month of learning English Grammar and Vocabulary for which I would be paid by the third of November. I need to be frugal to survive. There are many things which need to be bought but I barely have the budget to feed myself bread and milk everyday. I wonder how many people have even less than me.

3. I could rest well in the last few days. Binaural beats played a role in it. I fed myself well to get balance back. Gandhi’s last meal was richer than my average meals. This is a reflection on how minimalism is not for people living below poverty line. It’s for people who are well known or have millions in bank account as well as passports for every country in the world. I barely move around the city practicing minimalism in the last eight years. I was held captive since last thirty five years. And what freedom do I find after waking up?

4. Many magic shows and circus shows. Now I know how complex karmic webs are woven by authors. I am not bored because it’s an infinite adventure. A never-ending journey. An everlasting class. The bad news is: all help, magic and miracles are available when you’re delirious, feverish, have barely anything to eat or feed yourself. When you walk too long or run too long. When you beg or bend too low before others repeatedly for the same things they also need.

5. It was a pleasant Sunday. I have a smartphone which was gained when I had lost desire for it. With a delay of ten months. Revealing all karmic webs : individual, family, friends, neighborhood, architecture, municipal, logoi etc. I saw laotzu. One of my students needed it as well. Now all three of them have. The new batch has students who are too young to use a smartphone. I need to postpone all my requirements until I get my money back. Then I may buy some clothes, tennis balls, data recharge and other essential things.