Beauty!

Most beautiful is dancing light of grace. It’s scintillating light. It’s mysterious. It’s inside me and outside. It attracts my mind and delights my being. It’s cold bliss. It’s godhead. It’s without beginning or end spread all over the spacetime. It’s ceaseless dance of reality. It’s eternal. It’s limitless hence blissful. It’s making me blissful like itself. It’s making me a luminous being. This dance of light is what confers gnosis and philosophy is all about it. It is also known as Brahm. It’s resounding in my being as Omkara. These divine melodies are same as this scintillating light. It tastes as nectar of immortality which is also known as ambrosia. It’s what has filled every fibre of my body with cold bliss. It’s as if a flood of bliss has engulfed my body. This light has been the object of my research off late. It’s direct knowledge. Immediate without any agency. The vibration frequency of this light varies based on how intensely active it’s at any given time in my body. This light can be seen with my eyes which act as camera. It also enters via the third eye which is located at the junction between the eyebrows also known as pineal gland.

It’s beautiful without any form. Formless form being most exquisite is a paradox. It’s so because only that which makes you feel blissful is truly beautiful.

Bliss!

The mystic dance,

Mixing with every cell,

Blasts in bliss,

It’s without a beginning or an end.

It’s beyond everything and yet

Knower of all.

It doesn’t judge you for your rank

Because compared to it everything is limited-no matter how exalted it seems.

It’s neither one nor many because it’s the only thing,

It knows no other.

To this bliss : every being belongs.

Towards this bliss: every being strives

To this bliss every being returns,

Eventually.

What do I see?

What do I see?

You asked.

And instead of tending the grazing cow away,

I chose to see it,

I didn’t respond,

Because the dancing sky has me dazed,

And it quenched my thirst,

With flute, drum and sirens.

Whatever I say about it,

Is like a lamp unto Sun,

What do I see?

I really don’t know.

Silence of the Birds!

1. Cranes are roaming in the field. Yellow butterflies flutterby. A kingfisher is basking in the Sun on a branch of a tree. Its counterpart comfortably perched down near group of white birds. A bird on top of the hut before me looks for a while at me then looks right. Another blackbird on another branch. A kite is flying in the sky. I haven’t seen Magpie Robin since last few days. The sky has been portraying many visuals worthy of being appreciated.

2. I played five vocabulary jams. Kavita J was one of the top scorers. I intend to play more. In one of the jams where I got a score of 830, the timer of the quiz slowed down so much that we could all score 100 points on most of the questions. On other quizzes it often moves randomly: sometimes where I deserve 100 points I only get 40. Yet: it’s not to dispute superior skill of some players like PC and Claire G. They have been scoring consistently.

3. Filled water for kitchen.

4. Put the tall Gandhi picture back to library.

5. It was put before Gandhi statue for observing silence. The statue was established by some social servants about 70 years ago on Gandhi jayanti.

6. Plucked 54 marigold flowers from Biotic Farm.

7. Sweeped library floor. And verandah.

8. Helped remove chador after assembly ended.

9. Prayers, recitation of poetry and speeches.

Here are the pictures I could capture:

Madhya Pradesh Gandhi Smarak Nidhi Chhatarpur
Library, Gandhi Smarak Bhavan Chhatarpur
Photographer photographed: same guy who had a friend who filled library membership form but didn’t come back: husband of the naturopath
Madhya Pradesh Gandhi Smarak Nidhi Chhatarpur

Are you!

Am I dreaming or are you?

Screaming in my ears…are you?

“stop”

Half of a song…

Was it really too long…

As long as throngs were wrongs…

Pangs and bangs hang on doors in form of canopies.

Am I dreaming or are you…

Thiruvachakam!

1. Venus. 13.11.2020: 4.2.2020. Uranus Conjunct Sun. Take care of your heart. Your art sweetheart. Sweet art. Tweet.

2. Arcturus. Rustic. Tic-tac-toe.

3. Vyagh. Vyaghrapada. Natarajan.

4. Ariel. A real estate state. A gem.

5. As a bowler rests between two balls; the heart rests between two beats.

6. Oh mount of Grace! When will I get to see the Tenet in its best print!

7. Oh mount of Grace! When will I get to watch the Vyapam scam made into one of the best mystery thrillers ever made: in which, all fake certificates will verily become sweet fragrance of camphor divine?

8. Oh mountain of Grace! When will I do my doctorate from Massachusetts institute of technology without any loans hanging over my head! Oh divine dancer formless and with form! When will I be employed in thy true service?

9. My divine victorious dancer: I pray and prey to thy dancing feet: when will thou grace me in race!

10. Oh all-in-all: supreme grace! Oh sublime beauty, oh perfect enlightenment!

11. Oh reviver of deads! Verily beautiful, blissful fulgent gentry tryst with tiny and miny.

12. Oh dancinglightofgrace! Oh DLOG!

13. I humbly request you to permanently release me from cycles of birth, death, limitations and aging. Injury and fear. I want it and need it: complete and infinite freedom and all that comes with it.

Reference: Ratna Navaratanam: Thiruvachakam.

Now I have three tennis balls!!!And four plastic balls!!!!

1. I need to be short and precise here as I need to join a Vocabulary jam soon.

2. I bought a Mark tennis ball to celebrate Dhanateras festival.

3. We walked and talked about things for more than three hours. We had water balls. In a thread of conversation: the stall owner told about the tax he has to submit to the municipal corporation as well as multiple chains of command. The same thing was spoken of by a tea stall owner who is a veteran. Advanced marble. Why did we all end up landing in a world which is so poor? The first and foremost: we fucked too much. We are overpopulated. Next things next. European countries have all people living luxuriously. No poverty.

4. I am still wondering about who deleted my entire post today afternoon. It wasn’t me and it didn’t evaporate on its own. The pure white cotton sent me into deep Samadhi. Profound love!

5. I lost one of the lenses of one of the pairs of glasses due to inadvertence.

6. A father was talking to his ward:”don’t you fall asleep on the bike.”

7. The question was: what would you have done differently if you were taken to an age where you were 20 years old.

8. As I began recalling: the question was changed to: what would you have done to improve your financial situation?

9. I clearly answered: I would have preferred getting admitted to a hospital in Bangalore over being brought here to a place where I was going to lose freedom. When I fell ill in 2012: I wouldn’t have come here when Vandana called me. The firm I worked for would have paid for the treatment and I would have emerged victorious without having to worry about local goons, mafia or people(mostly family) who snatched my documents, freedom and means of livelihood away.

10. It has been a long day. Despite the walk and discussion.

My assistants!

1. I had a dream. I wrote a story. A long thread. Books. Kabir. Chetandas. Ramananda. Bhaas. Moon. Sun. Baanbhatta.

2. Tells you nothing you know!

3. There are so many people working for me!

4. Baadraayana. Bhasa. Bana. Nalini. Lily. Sun. Moon. Logos. Yahweh. IAMTHATIAM. Dark girl on her birthday. Dreams and their fulfilment.

Masonic Pulav!

1. The guy was wearing glasses. His assistant served me. Then he handed me over the plastic spoon. The assistant was slow. I was in awe of the quality of rice: they looked like Basmati grade. The Chhole curry and plastic spoon. It was only ten rupees per plate! I couldn’t believe my good fortune. It was only on rare festive occasions that such rice was made here in this house and it was always a tense affair here. There, you had it all under a tree, looking at the open sky. When I asked him if I would find him there everyday: he replied in affirmative. He has begun to serve kulcha from today onwards. I really trust him when he says:” I am an artist; glad even if I get my investment back.”

2. Phantom’s song: pehle kyun na mile hum…tanha hi kyun chale hum…was ringing in my ears when I had this plate of pulav. I requested for another plate. This was the best meal of the year after the bread soaked in the sweet milk bought from Neelesh Milk Dairy.

3. It took some time before full import of his words was revealed. I realized that he goes to serve in ceremonies or delivers upon orders. It was mostly for festivals and his everyday practice was to keep him in shape.

4. Shri had to take another test. She had classes for about four hours out of five. I observed her real voice for the first time when she was rooting for marks in the test. I knew that it was hidden somewhere. If she had done her homework it wouldn’t have become a test but the process instilled the meaning of words as well as the technique to learn and retain the meaning.

5. KK finally surrendered. This usually happens with young people and in such cases experience proves to be right. I had issued three books for two girls who didn’t turn up either to read book or to submit the security deposit or fees. Unless I had been prompt: the librarian plus other chains of command would have caught me by my collar and hectored me. Now books are with KK who might read them or return them. It’s not violation of any law of the library.

6. Madam secretary put some oil into the lock and it worked. Her practical intelligence is immense in that sense. She can drive tractor, stitch, attend prayer meetings, speak English, Oriya, Bengali and she has clairvoyant powers as well.

7. Sprinklers in the field need study. I read a story by Munshi Premchand. It was titled “Prarabdh.” It was from the collection of 23 stories named “Mansarovar.” The story felt much better than the one I read yesterday. Yesterday’s story was by Tagore. I feel Tagore was a better poet than a storyteller or maybe I have read very little of him. I had his Geetanjali in my college days which I used to show to every visitor. This story by Premchand has its protagonist going through various delirious states and delusions before finally committing suicide. The story was chosen by me at random, like yesterday’s, and yet they both highlighted importance of destiny and inbetween life and death when intelligence becomes subtle and delusions strike.

7. I bowled thirty times. The stadium hardly had ten or twelve people when I reached and I could practice peacefully.

Team Blue Wins The Jam With a Total of -55 Points!

1. It’s only the second time: the team red scored -685 points. Total number of people who played: 45.

2. I finally emerged as a HUGE leader after scoring like these:

222223431

3. Those second ranks were mostly when that guy PC from Massachusetts was scoring straight A’s. I could have bickered about buses, mopeds and police here in the stadium but I accepted my defeat.

4. Claire took over the reigns for one game before we entered into the negative energy : me emerging as victorious with the leadership of less negative a team and a HUGE advantage over runner up.

5. That was after I had a sandwich. All chat shops are crowded: some tea shops are thriving because of electoral process.

Commitments

1. I scored 112451 ranks in six jams on Vocabulary.com.

2. Most of my commitments to coach students were so short-lived that i could barely introduce them to techniques which might help them master English vocabulary. Why is it so? Most of them drift away. Most of them don’t have enough resources. Most of their communities come to teach me instead of learning from me. They pretend as if they want to learn English but mostly they are about hearsay and moral chastisement. Imagine taking character certificate from sons and daughters of Satan : repeatedly until the end of times. It’s Sisyphean task.

3. I had a nice time practicing bowling in the evening session. I bowled 65 times, took couple of pictures and watched others play. I also heard some quality music. The attestation to having divorced the Mula constellation: even if it’s only partially: is to be able to create events without getting bored. Mula born get bored very easily. 2020 was the year when I mastered boredom and also grasped some nuances of transmigration of soul as per Buddhism and Hinduism. Egyptian mysteries elude.

4. if it says anywhere that some souls burn in hell fire forever: I have read Quran but I only found: Aleph, Liam, meme and shin in it. I had only this much to say and I said this to a muslim teacher and scholar as well: What about those who are already in hell? Who suffers? Is it not the Allah? Then : there must be another agency: discover that agency which is present in both heaven, hell as well as in inbetween. Moreover: Muhammad himself would have known what it’s like to recall previous painful memories when revelations happen: if he was never completely free from the pain they created for him how could he have laid down laws in stone: like Moses and others? It was like writing in prison where no free will exists whatsoever.

5. Purgatory and then back to Earth, Heaven and so on are better concepts. I don’t see various religions as more than vying for spacetime and energy in their domains. Vikram, Hizri, Christian and other eras: all memories of great wars and further wars: era of Donald Bradman, Kapil Dev, Tendulkar, Gandhi, Pele, Modi and Trump. Everyone fighting for the bigger piece of bread. Basically: animal kingdom shown as religious kingdom. Conditions given in Purana for attaining Godhead are so difficult that most human beings have no salvation. Has singularity been reached: are actually machines in charge here? What about Steven Greer’s Disclosure? Where are Sirius, Orion and other civilization beings? Will police and military be back to stadium and streets which are already overpopulated and overcrowded? I don’t have any answer.